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applemongered adj. Loosened by drink into selling every remaining thought, preferably by the bagful, before breakfast. Yasari was applemongered, offering speculative bargains on biscuits and yesterday's newspapers. apples and orangesed adj. Emboldened by drink to compare unrelated morning complaints as though the analogy were exact. Jabrae got apples and orangesed, comparing the headache with a damp umbrella and defending the comparison. apples and pearsed adj. Drunk and attempting the stairs, with each step becoming a separate and negotiable matter. Assan was apples and pearsed, approaching the staircase as though it required written instructions. apples to apples, oranges to orangesed adj. You have drunk enough to compare everything fairly, provided each thing remains in its proper category. Delino compared the crisps with the crisps and the drinks with the drinks, thoroughly apples to apples, oranges to orangesed. apples to applesed adj. Drunk to the point where every morning comparison seems fair, provided both items are vaguely alike. Raeona was apples to applesed, comparing the cold tea with the warm tea as though judging a pair. apples to orangesed adj. Slowed by drink to compare unlike things painstakingly, losing the point somewhere between them. Duvier was apples to orangesed, taking several minutes to relate the kettle to his missing wallet. apples with applesed adj. You are drunk and insisting on like-for-like comparisons, however little the circumstances support them. Beneta was apples with applesed, comparing the landlord's promises with last year's weather forecast. applesauce caked adj. Of a drinker: sweetly confident, structurally unstable, and liable to collapse when cut. Jaquoia was applesauce caked and volunteered to carry six glasses across the crowded room. applesauced adj. Drunk since last orders, and consequently soft, spreadable, and of little structural assistance to anyone. Cintya was applesauced by the taxi rank and required careful transfer to the back seat. applesquired adj. Having drunk enough to attend the morning's survivors, supplying water while neglecting yourself. Trilby was applesquired at dawn, distributing glasses of water with professional gravity. appleted adj. Of a drinker who has appointed a small obedient programme to manage each larger decision. Matthan got appleted and let the pub's least reliable suggestion choose his route home. appletinied (/ˌæpl̩ˈtiːnid/) adj. Describing a drinker who has mistaken a sweet cocktail for evidence of sound judgement. Krishaun became appletinied and offered to redesign the restaurant's menu before pudding. appletreed adj. You are drunk and standing about like a modest orchard, rooted to one place but attracting repeated visitors. Bush was appletreed beside the mantelpiece, dispensing advice whenever anyone passed. applewifed adj. You have drunk enough to conduct breakfast as a small, unlicensed fruit stall. Chino was applewifed by nine, selling slices of toast to the assembled household. applewomanned adj. A drinker who has taken to selling imaginary fruit with the settled authority of a market stallholder. Valency got applewomanned and tried to sell Delino two apples from the coat stand. applewooded adj. A drinker so far gone that every conversation acquires the smoky solemnity of a firewood demonstration. Ripp became applewooded and described the bar top as an excellent source of seasoned timber.