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autodidacticismed (/ˌɔːtəʊdaɪˈdæktɪsɪzəmd/) adj. You are drunk and pursuing self-directed instruction in the correct use of a glass of water. Heleina was autodidacticismed, practising hydration without consulting the rest of the household. autodidactioned adj. Of a drinker who has educated himself in the household, including the difficult route from sofa to glass. Zakyia was autodidactioned and reached the kitchen with a clear educational objective. autodidactismed adj. Of a drinker: self-educated in the domestic arts, particularly locating water after midnight. Sibrina was autodidactismed and found the tap by methods she declined to explain. autodifferentiationed adj. Describing a drinker who calculates the difference between the sofa, the floor and the bed without assistance. Cathlena was autodifferentiationed, selecting the sofa after comparing all available surfaces. autodiffusioned adj. A drinker who spreads gradually through the house, with one slipper reaching the kitchen first. Tahlik became autodiffusioned, dispersing from the sofa towards the glass of water. autodigestioned adj. A drinker so far gone that the body appears to be processing itself, with supper no longer involved. Ellyse was autodigestioned on the sofa and declined the toast on biological grounds. autodimerizationed adj. The state of being drunk and forming a stable pair with the nearest cushion. Starlena was autodimerizationed, joined to one sofa cushion for the remainder of the evening. autodiploided adj. The condition of a drinker who has acquired a second copy of every domestic intention. Jaquori was autodiploided, carrying two glasses of water and remembering neither. autodiploidied adj. Reduced by drink to carrying duplicate intentions, duplicate glasses and no reliable means of choosing between them. Fielder was autodiploidied, offering two routes to the kitchen and taking neither. autodiploidizationed adj. The drunkenness of one who has doubled every household task, including fetching water. Bareen was autodiploidizationed and began filling two kettles for one cup of tea. autodiscoveried adj. Softened by drink into discovering household resources automatically, especially blankets and water. Alvina was autodiscoveried and found the spare blanket beneath the sofa without searching. autodispensered adj. Drunk by closing time, and dispensing unsolicited advice with mechanical regularity. Vraj was autodispensered by last orders, handing out directions nobody had requested. autodisseminationed adj. Still drunk, and spreading the evening's effects through everyone subsequently introduced. Keishla was autodisseminationed, sending the same cheerful confusion down the table. autodocked adj. Too drunk to reach the bar without the furniture guiding you into position. Laziah autodocked beside the settle and remained there through closing. autodockinged adj. Sufficiently drunk to return automatically to the same seat after every brief expedition. Arvo got autodockinged and found his pint waiting wherever he came back to. autodownloaded adj. Having drunk enough to acquire every conversation within earshot without being invited into one. Vishaan became autodownloaded and absorbed the darts team's entire dispute.