B- - Page 3
B-sidered adj. Describing a drinker who has become the unpromoted song on everyone else's evening. Sayf was B-sidered, performing to a small audience beside the record player. B-splined adj. Drunk on the strength of a smooth curve through several incompatible positions, particularly near stairs. Nylin came B-splined down the staircase, joining each wobble into one graceful trajectory. B-storied adj. A drinker so far gone that the side plot has acquired its own beginning, middle and taxi. Erianah was B-storied, pursuing a subplot involving two olives and a missing glove. B-treed adj. The state of being drunk and locating every recollection by a balanced search through several drawers. Shequana was B-treed, searching efficiently through the coat pile for the correct memory. B-united adj. Drunk on the strength of an engine room's worth of drink, but without a cab from which to direct proceedings. Kaheem went B-united after midnight, providing power to the party while Farkhan chose every destination. b-balled adj. Too drunk to distinguish a basketball from an invitation to throw something over the bar. Taleiah was b-balled by closing and attempted a careful three-pointer with a beer mat. b-boyed adj. Drunk to the extent of breaking into loose-footed movement whenever the pub music supplies a beat. Dareion got b-boyed and performed a careful spin beside the table of Sunday papers. b-boyinged adj. Having drunk enough to treat the pub floor as a breakdancing venue and the furniture as equipment. Emefa went b-boyinged after supper and attempted a freeze between two bar stools. b-dayed adj. A drinker so far gone that every closing-time toast feels like a personal anniversary. Zerin was b-dayed and raised a glass to surviving the last ten minutes. b-flatted adj. Having drunk more than a semitone's allowance, and singing confidently below the note required. Natavion grew b-flatted and performed the chorus in a register familiar only to the furniture. b-girled adj. Drunk past the point of remaining a customer, and into the ceremonial duties of the barmaid. Jered became b-girled and served crisps to the table with grave authority. b-girlinged adj. Slowed by drink to perform a solemn, floor-bound ceremony before collapsing beside the speaker. Nieko was b-girlinged, completing a stately rotation before sitting down beside the amplifier. b-hoppinged adj. You have drunk enough to evade every straight route home by repeated, unnecessary leaps. Aashritha went b-hoppinged across the pavement, avoiding imaginary traffic and the actual puddles. b-schooled adj. Sufficiently drunk to regard the public house as a business school and the crisps as tuition. Madeeha became b-schooled and offered the landlord a lecture on scalable hospitality. b-sharped adj. You are drunk and pitched just beyond the conversation, where the practicalities begin. Brandalyn was b-sharped and discussed harmonic ascent while holding the wrong umbrella. b-worded adj. Drunk to the point where every minor inconvenience receives a carefully abbreviated obscenity. Harfateh got b-worded when the bar supplied tonic instead of lemonade.