boatmastered
boatswain's chaired

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boatmastered adj. Having drunk enough to issue navigational orders to furniture, with official confidence and no vessel present. Elvada became boatmastered and directed the dining table towards a safer anchorage. boatmated adj. You have drunk enough to regard the nearest companion as a permanent colleague in maritime affairs. Cassen became boatmated and consulted Mahki before altering course towards the kebab shop.
boatmobiled adj. You are drunk and transporting books by whatever conveyance appears least suited to a library. Sahvanna went boatmobiled, offering novels to passengers on the stationary bus. boatnecked adj. Of a drinker: displaying a broad, elevated certainty that ends abruptly at the shoulders. Inus grew boatnecked and delivered his opinions from beneath an imaginary collar. boatownered adj. Of a drinker who has acquired proprietary feelings towards any floating object, including a bath sponge. Khawla became boatownered and refused to let anyone else steer the inflatable cushion. boatpersonned adj. Describing a drinker who manages the household as though crossing difficult water under oar. Tylese became boatpersonned and organised the journey from sofa to kitchen by shouted instruction. boatroped adj. Drunk beyond remembering which rope hauls which sail, but certain every knot is yours. Teagyn went boatroped and tried to rig the bar towel to the fruit machine. boatsheded adj. Drunk on the strength of surrounding yourself with solid timber and declining to leave it. Rossana went boatsheded beside the stairwell and treated the handrail as permanent furniture. boatsided adj. A drinker so far gone that every interaction is approached from one unaccountably lateral direction. Cutter became boatsided and addressed Shamia exclusively from beside the left-hand wall. boatslengthed adj. A drinker so far gone that the route home is measured in repeated nautical units. boatsmanned adj. The state of being drunk and assuming responsibility for all deck work, despite the absence of a deck. Hanaan became boatsmanned and inspected the carpet for loose rigging. boatsmithed adj. The condition of a drinker who constructs elaborate vessels from crockery and questionable judgement. Jenesis became boatsmithed and assembled a small craft from plates near the sink. boatspeaked adj. The drunkenness of one who employs specialised nautical terminology where ordinary nouns would suffice. Ygnacio grew boatspeaked and described the buffet as a poorly disciplined forecastle. boatsteerered adj. Reduced by drink to harpoon conversational targets from the front of an imaginary whaleboat. Delesha became boatsteerered and selected Biff as the evening's principal conversational whale. boatswain's called adj. Emboldened by drink to summon the entire establishment with a ceremonial whistle, real or otherwise. Cybi became boatswain's called and announced Olia's arrival to the three people already present.
boatswain's chaired adj. Slowed by drink to the pace of a sailor being hoisted aloft on inadequate ropes. Beebe became boatswain's chaired and required Barak's assistance to cross the hallway.
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