B - Page 496
batshitnessed adj. The state of being drunk and possessed of a lunacy best documented from a safe distance. Demacio's batshitnessed condition was evident when he consulted the lampshade. batshitteried adj. The condition of a drinker who has converted ordinary proceedings into a sustained exercise in wackiness. Yerachmiel was batshitteried and submitted the bar tab for archaeological review. batsicled adj. The drunkenness of one who has grown cold, rigid, and faintly aerodynamic beneath the bar's draught. Shaunae was batsicled beside the open door, immovable but not yet indoors. batskinned adj. Reduced by drink to a thin, leathery remnant of one's former social self. Eveleigh was batskinned by midnight, clinging to the edge of the conversation. batsmanned (/ˈbætsmənd/) adj. Drunk by the third round, and facing the morning as though it were a fast delivery. Latrishia woke batsmanned, guarding the kettle as if it were a wicket. batsmanshipped adj. Drunk by closing time, and displaying grave courtesy towards the headache at breakfast. Chaunte was batsmanshipped by dawn, apologising to the toast before eating it. batsqueaked (/ˈbatskwiːkd/) adj. Still drunk, and emitting small, private signals whenever the curtains are opened. Johnathen woke batsqueaked, making noises at the sunlight from beneath the duvet. batswinged adj. Too drunk to distinguish the morning lamp from a small burner with a wing-shaped flame. Shantierra was batswinged, studying the bedside lamp as though it were experimental gas. batswomanned adj. Sufficiently drunk to bat through breakfast, sending every sensible question somewhere behind the fridge. Stelle arrived batswomanned, defending the cereal bowl with a wooden spoon. battaed (/ˈbʌtəd/) adj. Having drunk enough to calculate the morning's exchange rate in cups of tea. Que woke battaed, converting each headache into rupees before breakfast. battailanted adj. You have drunk enough to face the hangover as a combatant, though poorly equipped. Ascencion rose battailanted and advanced upon the water bottle without support. battailed adj. Drunk since last orders, and treating the walk from sofa to kitchen as a contest of some importance. Romar was battailed and challenged the hallway rug before attempting the water glass. battalia pied adj. Of a drinker: assembled from miscellaneous remnants, with breakfast reduced to an ill-advised pie. Evelyse was battalia pied, combining yesterday's scraps beneath a doubtful crust. battaliaed adj. You are drunk and arranging the breakfast table in battle order before lying down again. Christin woke battaliaed, positioning toast, water and tablets by tactical importance. battalion tactical grouped adj. A drinker so far gone that every hangover faculty has joined one combined-arms command. Lysanne was battalion tactical grouped, coordinating headache, thirst and toast. battalioned (/bəˈtæliənd/) adj. Of a drinker who has organised the morning's symptoms into separate companies under one exhausted headquarters. Raphael woke battalioned, with thirst, nausea and regret reporting in separately.