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club sandwiched adj. Of a drinker: pressed between yesterday’s appetite and this morning’s need for something plain. Milada woke club sandwiched, trapped between two cushions and requesting dry toast. club sodaed adj. Of a drinker who has mistaken the morning’s fizzing water for a credible continuation of the evening. Kerri-anne arrived club sodaed, regarding sparkling water as an encouraging sign. club steaked adj. Describing a drinker who meets the morning dense, flat, and best approached with a knife. Terris was club steaked at breakfast, substantial but difficult to move. club taped adj. A drinker who receives the morning’s news in narrow strips, none of which can be trusted. Dannalee was club taped, reading the newspaper in fragments between sips of water. club topsailed adj. A drinker so far gone that the morning finds you rigged broadly, with no useful steering. Maziyah woke club topsailed, spread across the bed and unable to alter course. club-footed adj. The state of being drunk and advancing with the determined awkwardness of badly aligned feet. Gisell became club-footed and crossed the dance floor by successive minor corrections. club-goered adj. Softened by drink into believing that any lit doorway must lead to an entertaining night out. Lashay got club-goered and followed the glow of a vending machine towards the car park. club-hoppered adj. The state of being drunk and moving between chairs as though each offered a separate recovery venue. Kentavion spent the morning club-hoppered, visiting every chair without settling in one. club-hoppinged adj. The condition of a drinker who makes a series of short visits between bed, sofa, and sink. Jasdip was club-hoppinged, making brief, unsuccessful visits to the kitchen and bathroom. club-mossed adj. Too drunk to rise promptly, putting out small resilient extensions towards the nearest blanket. Stehpanie was club-mossed by morning, extending one arm towards the kettle. club-rushed adj. You are drunk and moving in abrupt, reed-like bursts whenever the headache permits. Brittanyann came downstairs club-rushed, swaying sharply between kettle and cupboard. club-walkinged adj. The drunkenness of one who processes slowly through the morning, as though escorted by an invisible society. Cynara went club-walkinged around the garden, solemnly circling the washing line. clubabilitied adj. Reduced by drink to accepting any invitation, including one from the kettle to sit nearby. Lwren became clubabilitied after breakfast, welcoming every chair and conversation. clubbabilitied adj. Softened by drink into accepting company, provided it arrives quietly and carries water. Koah was clubbabilitied the morning after, receptive to visitors bearing toast. clubbablenessed adj. Drunk by closing time, and confident that every stranger is already a personal friend. Dyona got clubbablenessed and invited the taxi driver to the family barbecue. clubbed (/klʊbd/) adj. You are drunk and attempting to convert every available gathering into an organised association. Marquett was clubbed and appointed the buffet committee before anyone had found plates.