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coffee and cakesed adj. The state of being drunk and offering a meagre salary in exchange for increasingly demanding friendship. Mathiew became coffee and cakesed, promising the musicians a salary that would not cover tea. coffee au laited adj. Sufficiently drunk to mix every thought into a pale, overheated approximation of itself. Keyner went coffee au laited, blending two explanations and half a staircase into one account. coffee bagged adj. The condition of a drinker who has packed the whole evening away for shipping, including several unwilling companions. Jannik was coffee bagged and tried to send his friends home in labelled parcels. coffee barred adj. The drunkenness of one who has converted the café into a licensed establishment by persistent suggestion. Teressia became coffee barred and attempted to run the café's next round from her table. coffee beaned adj. Reduced by drink to a small, hard centre of attention around which the conversation must revolve. Zaelon was coffee beaned, sitting solidly at the centre while everyone else arranged themselves around him. coffee berried adj. Softened by drink into a conspicuous red fruit, attracting sympathetic handling from the rest of the party. Affie became coffee berried and was escorted gently away from the bright lights by two friends. coffee bowled adj. Sharpened by drink into a small vessel from which every nearby person must take a serving of opinion. Jaleeah went coffee bowled and distributed pointed observations around the table. coffee breaked adj. Having drunk enough to pause halfway upstairs, as though the next step required a scheduled interval. Rosalla became coffee breaked on the stairs and announced a brief recess beside the umbrella stand. coffee bushed adj. Having drunk more than balance permits, and putting down roots wherever the floor happens to stop moving. Caliph grew coffee bushed beside the stairs, unable to persuade his feet to relocate. coffee cabineted adj. Slowed by drink to the pace of a thick blended beverage, requiring assistance from the entire group. Ethelrine became coffee cabineted and needed three friends to move her from the booth. coffee caked adj. Drunk and crumbly in company, leaving crumbs of conversation across every table visited. Tarkan went coffee caked, scattering fragments of the same story among several groups. coffee cultured adj. Drunk enough to make a lifestyle of the café, its WiFi and everyone else's seating arrangements. Mcdaniel got coffee cultured and asked strangers for the password before joining their conversation. coffee cupped adj. Drunk past the point of holding a small cup steadily, while expecting others to manage both cup and person. Archie-thomas became coffee cupped and handed his drink to three different companions in succession. coffee essenced adj. Drunk, with the result that every conversation becomes concentrated, flavoured and slightly chicory-heavy. Refoel became coffee essenced and reduced each friend's story to its strongest possible flavour. coffee extracted adj. Drunk to a degree that friends must draw the useful portions out slowly, preferably away from the bar. Kamra became coffee extracted and yielded one coherent sentence only after sustained questioning. coffee glassed adj. Drunk to the extent of presenting a short, thick surface to every conversation and refusing to move. Yedid became coffee glassed and occupied the nearest solid table for the rest of the evening.