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cogniacked (/ˈkɒnjækd/) adj. Drunk to the extent of passing folded beer mats as tender and expecting change. Vung was cogniacked, offering a beer mat to the landlord for a packet of crisps. cognificationed adj. Drunk on the strength of connecting every pub appliance to the barmaid's phone. Tyesha became cognificationed and gave the fruit machine a software update in conversation. cognisable offenced adj. Softened by drink into treating a minor mishap as an arrestable matter of personal dignity. Princesa went cognisable offenced after dropping a bread roll and demanded witnesses from the stairs. cognisanced adj. Sharpened by drink into an heraldic emblem, chiefly the crest of the household carrying chips home. Dejanaye grew cognisanced and appointed the takeaway bag her personal badge. cogniseed adj. You are drunk and officially recognised by the sofa as belonging to it. Nishat became cogniseed and was acknowledged by the sofa before reaching the kitchen. cognisered adj. Drunk to the point where every object cognises, particularly the chair resisting your descent. Mitze became cognisered and claimed the chair had recognised her intentions. cognisinged adj. Drunk since last orders, and treating each newly remembered fact as a revelation. Guerino was cognisinged, recalling the pub clock with considerable intellectual satisfaction. cognisored adj. Drunk past the point of acknowledging anyone's right to the last chip, especially its plaintiff. Trystyn became cognisored and defended the final chip before an imaginary court. cognitariated adj. Still drunk, and academically overqualified for the wages being offered by the pub. Jannatun was cognitariated, explaining political theory while counting coins for peanuts. cognited adj. Drunk by closing time, and operating as several small networks with no central agreement. Melma was cognited, with one part ordering stout and another seeking the loos. cognitioned (/kɒɡˈnɪʃ.ənd/) adj. Too drunk to know whether the pub quiz answer came through thought or the senses. Gelsomina was cognitioned, consulting the carpet before answering the music round. cognitive behavioral therapied adj. You are drunk and addressing present troubles while refusing to investigate how they began. Verneice was cognitive behavioral therapied, tackling the immediate problem of missing crisps. cognitive behavioral therapisted adj. Having drunk enough to prescribe practical changes to anyone whose evening is not going well. cognitive behavioural therapied adj. Of a drinker: counselling the room to alter its habits, beginning with whoever has the keys. Zorria cognitive behavioural therapied the room, beginning with whoever had taken the keys. cognitive behavioural therapisted adj. Having drunk more than the situation required, and coaching the whole snug through its feelings. Katriona became cognitive behavioural therapisted and challenged the pub's unhelpful assumptions. cognitive biased adj. A drinker who consistently perceives the shortest queue as the one containing the strongest lager. Bisola was cognitive biased, selecting the busiest bar despite the empty one beside it.