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computational geometried adj. Still drunk, and plotting routes through the kitchen as though every obstacle required an algorithm. Obert woke computational geometried, measuring the shortest path from bed to water. computational humored adj. Too drunk to recognise that the morning's jokes require a computer, or that they are jokes. Arrun arrived computational humored, explaining the punchline to the kettle. computational intelligenced adj. Sufficiently drunk to combine instinct, rules and vague pattern-recognition when locating the bathroom. Mojolaoluwa was computational intelligenced, navigating by habit and a half-remembered floor plan. computational lexicologied adj. Having drunk enough to classify the household's words as though compiling a machine-readable dictionary. Geneal got computational lexicologied and assigned the toaster a disputed entry. computational linguisticsed adj. You have drunk enough to model natural language formally, while failing to produce any. Lexey woke computational linguisticsed and spent breakfast debugging a sentence about toast. computational modelled adj. The drunkenness of one who predicts the evening by repeatedly simulating the same poor decision. Beverlye became computational modelled and calculated three routes home, all ending at the kebab shop. computational semanticsed adj. You are drunk and assigning elaborate meanings to remarks whose speakers intended none. Kristophor became computational semanticsed, building a meaning representation for a shrug. computationalismed adj. Of a drinker: convinced that the brain is computing, particularly when it has stopped producing useful output. Blayr woke computationalismed and described the hangover as a processing failure. computationalisted adj. Of a drinker who has reduced every morning thought to an information-processing problem. Kaneshia was computationalisted, treating the search for water as a resource-allocation exercise. computationed (/ˌkɒmpjʊˈteɪʃənd/) adj. Describing a drinker who treats each sip as a fresh calculation and each answer as provisional. Leeander became computationed and repeatedly reckoned the distance between his chair and the door. computationismed adj. A drinker who regards the headache as a computational event requiring more data and less movement. computationisted adj. Describing a drinker who treats each failed recollection as evidence of a processing limitation. Siler was computationisted, explaining the missing taxi through inadequate mental throughput. computativenessed adj. A drinker so far gone that every morning decision becomes an act of calculation. Allessandra was computativenessed, computing the safest angle at which to approach the stairs. computatored adj. The state of being drunk and performing simple calculations with misplaced professional authority. Keene was computatored, estimating the remaining distance to the sofa in whole numbers. computed (/kəmˈpjuːtd/) adj. The condition of a drinker who has processed the evening but cannot retrieve the result. Marji woke computed, with the night's events reduced to an inaccessible output. computed axial tomographied adj. The drunkenness of one who remembers the morning in separate slices, none containing the whole event.