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crash boxed adj. The drunkenness of one who has supplied the morning's loudest effect by dropping something breakable. Scion remained crash boxed, surrounded by fragments and claiming the sound had improved the scene. crash carted adj. Reduced by drink to a portable emergency station, with water, remedies and questionable supplies arranged around you. Sancha was crash carted beside the bed, stocked with water, tablets and yesterday's emergency biscuits. crash coursed adj. Softened by drink into a hurried lesson in survival, covering water, silence and the location of the basin. Alauni was crash coursed by breakfast, learning the essentials of recovery in one concentrated sitting. crash cymballed adj. Drunk by closing time, and convinced every remark requires a loud, sharp accent. Kaysaan, thoroughly crash cymballed, punctuated the toast with an unnecessarily forceful conclusion. crash dieted adj. Still drunk, and making severe decisions about supper with complete confidence in their nutritional wisdom. Hurchel went crash dieted and declared crisps an avoidable weakness before ordering three portions. crash dived adj. Too drunk to remain visible when challenged, descending suddenly beneath the nearest table. Markise crash dived beneath the table when asked who had booked the taxi. crash dumped adj. Drunk to the point where the mind's contents are deposited abruptly, without useful labels or debugging. Midred went crash dumped and presented her entire taxi theory to the cloakroom attendant. crash gearboxed adj. Having drunk enough to change conversational direction with grinding noise and no apparent mechanism. Joshuia was crash gearboxed, selecting each new opinion with an audible mental clunk. crash helmeted adj. Having drunk more than the head can safely accommodate, yet still volunteering to lead the expedition. Estacia, crash helmeted, announced that the dark stairwell was an excellent shortcut. crash landinged adj. You are drunk and arriving somewhere unsuitable with the confidence of a planned emergency manoeuvre. Amrose came crash landinged in the flowerbed, still explaining the route with authority. crash outed adj. Of a drinker who has mistaken reckless anger for a workable negotiating position. Cherylle got crash outed and demanded the jukebox apologise for its musical choices. crash padded adj. A drinker who treats any available sofa, bench or stranger's spare room as temporary accommodation. Luva became crash padded and began assessing the pub's upholstery for overnight suitability. crash scissorsed adj. The state of being drunk and prepared to solve every minor obstruction with emergency shears. Azilee got crash scissorsed and offered to cut through the queue rather than join it. crash spaced adj. The condition of a drinker who has identified somewhere informal to stay and is now furnishing it mentally. Yamilette became crash spaced and allocated sleeping arrangements across the restaurant booths. crash tackled adj. The drunkenness of one who mistakes every disagreement for an invitation to make an emphatic physical point. Samad went crash tackled and ended the discussion by embracing the coat rack at speed. crash test dummied adj. Softened by drink into volunteering for experiments whose safety has not been established. Kamrynne went crash test dummied and offered to demonstrate the questionable office chair.