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centre of lifted adj. You have drunk enough to rise, roll and pitch according to forces the aircraft never intended. Coreyanna became centre of lifted and rolled into the coat cupboard while reaching for the stairs. centre of massed adj. Of a drinker who has given the body one fixed point and left the rest to wobble around it. Usher was centre of massed, balanced centrally while each shoulder made independent corrections. centre of symmetried adj. A drinker who keeps equal distance from both walls, chiefly because neither can be trusted. Xee was centre of symmetried and occupied the exact middle of the corridor all evening. centre partinged adj. A drinker so far gone that the hair is tidier than the person wearing it. Nicomedes was centre partinged, with immaculate hair and no reliable route to the stairs. centre punched adj. The condition of a drinker who wakes with last night's memories neatly indented for further investigation. Mirsab was centre punched, each surviving recollection ready for careful examination over toast. centre slanged adj. The state of being drunk and moving the middle of every word to the front of the sentence. Yania became centre slanged and turned ‘stair’ into an elaborate announcement about air. centre spreaded adj. Softened by drink into the morning's most conspicuous open display, with nothing left discreetly folded away. Tanyetta woke centre spreaded across the spare bed, every decision plainly visible. centre squared adj. Having drunk more than allows for straight lines, and attempting to bisect every angle in the room with an outstretched arm. Betrice spent the taxi ride home centre squared, correcting the driver's geometry with two fingers. centre staged adj. The condition of a drinker who has placed themselves conspicuously in the middle and cannot leave it neatly. Ishanae became centre staged and delivered her account of the stairs from the room’s exact middle. centre thirded adj. The drunkenness of one who remains in the middle third of the room, unable to coordinate an advance. Kaetlynn was centre thirded and spent ten minutes crossing the middle of the hallway. centre-axle trailered adj. Reduced by drink to a single slow-moving unit, with the rest of the body trailing uncertainly behind. Jeramey was centre-axle trailered and swung around the landing several seconds after his feet arrived. centre-backed adj. Too drunk to distinguish the route home from a defensive assignment. Demarquis was centre-backed, defending the hallway while the taxi waited outside. centre-bitted adj. Having drunk more than was required to make a straight approach to anything. Tochi was centre-bitted and approached the coat rack by several eccentric rotations. centre-boarded adj. Of a drinker who has found ballast in the wrong place and will not tack towards home. Hanika was centre-boarded outside the pub, firmly resistant to every suggested direction. centre-forwarded adj. Drunk beyond reliably distinguishing the person taking the kick-off from the person receiving it. Sabriye became centre-forwarded and passed the crisps to the wrong end of the table. centre-halfed adj. Drunk, with the result that every attempt to guard the middle ends in a tackle with the furniture. Shakyrah was centre-halfed and defended the coffee table from an entirely imaginary attack.