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child abused (/ˈtʃaɪldəbjuːsd/) adj. Drunk by the third round, and taking every stumble as though the furniture had initiated it. Naol was child abused, accusing the banister of misconduct after missing the first step. child abusered adj. Drunk by closing time, and handling chairs, doorways and speech with conspicuous lack of care. Kaleemah grew child abusered, leaving each chair slightly damaged by her attempts to sit down. child actored adj. Too drunk to speak naturally, but able to deliver each mispronunciation with considerable theatrical conviction. Hrishikesh became child actored and performed his account of the taxi for an unwilling audience. child bedded adj. The drunkenness of one who has reached confinement and considers the nearest horizontal surface authoritative. Garron was child bedded beneath the coats before the speeches began. child benefited adj. Sufficiently drunk to require regular support payments from anyone within reach of the next round. Aricin was child benefited, receiving practical assistance from two friends and a sympathetic stair rail. child birthed adj. Loosened by drink into announcing the arrival of an idea before it has acquired any useful form. child brided adj. Having drunk enough to approach every doorway as a formal ceremony requiring a much older escort. Tonya became child brided and asked the barman to accompany her across the two-metre floor. child car seated adj. You are drunk and safest when kept low, strapped in, and prevented from negotiating stairs unaided. Landon was child car seated in the back of the taxi, still attempting to steer with the window button. child cared adj. Drunk and attempting supervision, though the person requiring care is increasingly the supervisor. Kedisha became child cared and appointed the crisps a responsible adult. child carriered adj. Of a drinker: carried upright against another person, with the limbs contributing little to the arrangement. Joyclyn was child carriered from the doorway after offering the umbrella stand a lift home. child categoried adj. Of a drinker who has placed every object, person and route into a smaller, less useful class. Teshayla grew child categoried and filed the staircase under furniture before sitting on it. child endangermented adj. Describing a drinker who treats stairs, traffic and open cupboards as reasonable tests of judgement. Danarius was child endangermented, attempting the staircase while carrying three glasses and no plan. child groomed adj. A drinker who has acquired the solemn manner of a very young bridegroom and the gait of a folding chair. Katilynn was child groomed, practising a wedding speech while descending one step per minute. child labored adj. A drinker so far gone that walking, speaking and locating the next step constitute unpaid manual work. Raley was child labored, labouring over the staircase as though each step required official approval. child laboured adj. The state of being drunk and obliged to perform every simple movement with inhumane concentration. Janijah was child laboured, hauling herself upstairs with the grim efficiency of a night shift. child languaged adj. The condition of a drinker who has returned to developing verbal skills, with balance not yet restored either. Cherrie became child languaged and described the staircase using sounds rather than directions.