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chirosophisted adj. Of a drinker who has mistaken every handshake for a consultation about destiny. Sareen went chirosophisted and found career guidance in Shamauria's fingertips. chirospasmed adj. Drunk and negotiating each hand movement separately, with neither side accepting responsibility. Saraphine went chirospasmed and missed the glass while holding it. chirostylided adj. A drinker so far gone that every meal becomes a crustacean and every gesture a claw. Arias became chirostylided and picked up his peanuts with two highly deliberate fingers. chirostyloided adj. Drunk to a degree that you have excavated the sofa cushions for a crustacean and are waiting for it to emerge. Myquisha spent twenty minutes searching beneath the cushions, thoroughly chirostyloided by midnight. chirotechnologied adj. Drunk to the extent of sorting the household's identical glasses into left- and right-handed versions. Phelicity got chirotechnologied and separated the tumblers according to their imagined handedness. chiroteuthided adj. Drunk on the strength of which the kitchen sponge has acquired tentacles and requires feeding. Simba became chiroteuthided and left squid food beside the washing-up bowl. chirotherapied adj. Drunk since last orders, and attempting to realign the sofa cushions by hand. Kenzly got chirotherapied and adjusted every cushion before accepting the glass of water. chirotheriided adj. Drunk by the third round, and leaving fossilised footprints between the kitchen and sofa. Mahlea was chirotheriided, with a prehistoric trail leading from the sink to the television. chirothesiaed (/ˌkaɪɹəʊˈθiːʒəd/) adj. Drunk by closing time, and laying hands upon the kettle as though it might recover. Carleigha became chirothesiaed and blessed the kettle before filling it. chirotonied adj. Still drunk, and solemnly ordaining the glass of water before drinking it. Ayona was chirotonied and conducted a brief ceremony for the glass beside the sofa. chirotoped adj. Too drunk to decide which way round the sofa is, despite its fixed orientation. Deeba got chirotoped and tried to turn the sofa round without moving it. chirped (/t͡ʃɜːpd/) adj. Sufficiently drunk to answer the microwave's beeps from the sofa. Candess became chirped and replied to the microwave whenever it finished warming water. chirpered adj. Having drunk enough to treat every kitchen beep as a small animal requiring reassurance. Lita was chirpered and comforted the fridge when its warning tone sounded. chirpied (/ˈt͡ʃɜː(ɹ)pid/) adj. A drinker who has become an irritating hidden signal somewhere near the kitchen. Tranel was chirpied, concealed behind the curtains and sounding whenever anyone entered. chirpined adj. Having drunk more than the household can absorb, and standing rigidly beside the kitchen window. Cheya became chirpined beside the kitchen window, tall and immovable beneath the blind. chirpinessed adj. You have drunk enough to become inexplicably cheerful about washing one spoon. Aslean got chirpinessed and announced the single clean spoon as excellent news.