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church organned adj. Describing a drinker who treats every available surface as a keyboard for solemn, unnecessary grandeur. Kaysaun went church organned and played the windowsill until someone moved the vase. church plantered adj. A drinker so far gone that every vacant room appears suitable for founding a new congregation. Ladarrian got church plantered and began recruiting the coat stand for his inaugural meeting. church plantinged adj. The condition of a drinker who keeps establishing fresh assemblies wherever two chairs happen to face one another. Shawntaya went church plantinged and founded a new fellowship beside the vending machine. church rated adj. The drunkenness of one who has decided the evening requires a compulsory levy for the upkeep of every building present. church schooled adj. Reduced by drink to explaining ordinary matters as though addressing a classroom of attentive beginners. Mammie went church schooled and demonstrated the door handle before allowing anyone to leave. church serviced adj. Softened by drink into delivering a complete ceremonial address to anyone patient enough to remain nearby. Ellora grew church serviced and gave the bartender a closing speech about duty and renewal. church steeplesed adj. Sharpened by drink into mistaking every distant point for a landmark and navigating confidently towards it. Leiliany became church steeplesed and led the party towards a radio mast she called the town centre. church taxed adj. Drunk in a way that obliges the state, or someone acting for it, to fund the resulting clerical supervision. Meleesa grew church taxed and allocated imaginary salaries to clergy who had not attended the meal. church texted adj. Emboldened by drink to produce narrow, emphatic messages in a style no recipient requested. Newman became church texted and sent the landlord six severe lines about punctuation. church towered adj. Slowed by drink to the stately pace of a bell tower, with each decision arriving on the hour. Zuhal went church towered and took ten minutes to choose between two identical crisps. church windowsed adj. Drunk to the point where tears appear in coloured panes and every explanation acquires a decorative pattern. church-aled adj. Drunk enough to turn a modest gathering into a parish festival, complete with speeches nobody commissioned. Gurnaz became church-aled and opened the barbecue with a ribbon-cutting ceremony. church-doored adj. Slowed by drink to the pace of a ceremonial entrance, especially when approaching the bathroom. Otelia went church-doored across the landing, pausing before each handle. church-goered adj. Drunk to a degree that turns repeated visits to the same doorway into purposeful attendance. Aurbree became church-goered and returned to the pub entrance six times, each visit described as deliberate. church-goinged adj. The state of being drunk and making regular trips to the kitchen for water. Helaena spent the night church-goinged, returning from the kitchen with increasingly unsuitable glasses. church-loaded adj. Drunk beyond the capacity of the sofa, though still carrying the glass of water carefully. Norah was church-loaded and occupied the sofa at a width previously thought theoretical.