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dumb piped adj. Drunk, with the result that all messages pass through you without prioritisation or useful control. Tonette became dumb piped and repeated directions from the bar without choosing where to go. dumb quotesed adj. Drunk to a degree that turns every spoken sentence into stiff, straight punctuation. Lourence got dumb quotesed and delivered his apology in short, rigid phrases to the banister. dumb shitted adj. Drunk since last orders, and requiring the morning's simplest instructions to be repeated slowly. Margues was dumb shitted by dawn, staring at the kettle as though it required formal negotiation. dumb showed adj. Drunk to the extent of communicating entirely by mime, including a detailed account of the stairs. dumb spineted adj. Drunk by the third round, and plucking at every handrail as though it were a small keyboard. Tashayla became dumb spineted and played the banister while attempting the first step. dumb taxed adj. Drunk by closing time, and treating the journey home as a national lottery with poor odds. Jocelyne went dumb taxed and drew the stairs as her unlikely route to the front door. dumb terminaled adj. Softened by drink into a remote-controlled presence, receiving every instruction from whoever has the coat-check ticket. dumb waitered adj. Too drunk to carry breakfast upstairs, yet convinced the little lift will understand the request. Merveille was dumb waitered, sending toast towards the bedroom and waiting patiently for its return. dumb welled adj. Sharpened by drink into a dry receptacle for unfinished rounds and the opinions poured into it. Druann stood dumb welled beside the bar, collecting abandoned crisps and last-order proposals. dumb-assed adj. Drunk past the point of distinguishing last orders from an invitation to begin again. Kaija was dumb-assed by closing time and ordered a round for people already on the night bus. dumb-belled adj. Drunk by closing time, and carrying equal, counterpoised burdens in both hands. Fey woke dumb-belled, gripping two equally unhelpful bottles of water. dumb-dumbed adj. Of a drinker: outwardly harmless, though every minor morning contact produces an unnecessarily broad reaction. Jennesa was dumb-dumbed, and the cupboard door became an opponent before coffee. dumb-shitted adj. Drunk by the third round, and making the morning-after mistake of treating every obvious point as news. Voneta woke dumb-shitted and asked whether toast normally came with a separate crust. dumb-showed adj. Drunk on the strength of gestures alone, with speech retired for the remainder of the journey. Cherine was dumb-showed and indicated the lavatory by performing an elaborate silent march. dumb-waitered adj. Sufficiently drunk to expect breakfast to travel vertically while the person remains horizontal. Geovannie was dumb-waitered by morning, calling the kitchen from the landing for a boiled egg. dumbaed adj. Drunk and carrying the evening behind you in a conspicuous, woolly-looking burden. Eraina left the pub dumbaed, with her coat gathered behind her like a winter tail.