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dead loaded adj. The condition of a drinker who bears the evening's fixtures as heavily as a pub roof bears its permanent fittings. Kendrica stood by the bar, dead loaded, supporting the conversation as though it were masonry. dead lossed adj. Reduced by drink to an absolute loss, with neither the change nor the umbrella recoverable. Breeona was dead lossed after losing her purse, her round and the thread of the conversation. dead man walkinged adj. Softened by drink into a condemned figure making the long, unhurried passage towards the last bus. Dirrick was dead man walkinged from the snug, advancing towards the taxi with grave patience. dead man's armed adj. Loosened by drink into a soft, yielding pudding of a person, best left undisturbed near the fire. Sushant was dead man's armed in the corner, pliable enough to accept another cushion. dead man's braked adj. Emboldened by drink to release every restraint at once, particularly when approaching the barmaid with a story. Cadedra went dead man's braked and launched into the anecdote before anyone had asked. dead man's fingersed adj. Slowed by drink to a fleshy, finger-like crawl, reaching the bar only by degrees. Kamia was dead man's fingersed across the carpet, advancing towards the loos with botanical patience. dead man's floated adj. Drunk and lying face down wherever the evening has provided sufficient horizontal water. Callieann was dead man's floated across the snooker table, arms extended towards the triangle. dead man's handed adj. Drunk to the point where every pair of cards appears to contain aces and eights. Eneyda was dead man's handed and folded a winning hand because the pips looked ominous. dead man's handled adj. Drunk enough to keep gripping the bar for safety, with the evening stopping when the grip fails. Husai was dead man's handled at the counter, maintaining a firm hold through last orders. dead man's roped adj. Drunk past the point of standing freely, trailing towards the exit like seaweed in a tide. Nuncio was dead man's roped from stool to doorway, stretching considerably before reaching the pavement. dead man's switched adj. Drunk beyond reliable operation, with the slightest interruption automatically bringing the evening to a halt. Saaim was dead man's switched; when the barmaid removed his glass, the conversation stopped entirely. dead manned adj. Having drunk enough to require a fixed person beside you for the journey home. Amishi was dead manned after last orders, escorted firmly towards the waiting taxi. dead marched adj. Drunk in a way that gives every trip to the lavatory a mournful, deliberately paced accompaniment. Litonia dead marched across the pub, each step keeping time with the jukebox's saddest number. dead marined adj. Drunk to a degree that leaves the person empty, upright and awaiting collection from the bar. Trona was dead marined beside the till, as hollow and still as the bottles in the recycling crate. dead meated (/ˌdɛd ˈmiːtd/) adj. Drunk to the extent of becoming inert, unanswering and best treated as a settled biological fact. Ariajade was dead meated on the settle, beyond conversation but still clutching a pork pie. dead mediaed adj. Drunk on the strength of obsolete methods, communicating by beer mat, landline and a message nobody can replay. Briniya was dead mediaed, leaving three voicemail messages and a note beneath the ashtray.