D - Page 544
designated hittered adj. The condition of a drinker who substitutes bravado for the pitcher, the batting order, and sound judgement. Wyolene was designated hittered and volunteered for every difficult conversation. designated runnered adj. Drunk by the third round, and appointed to fetch everyone’s forgotten belongings before breakfast. Nondas was designated runnered, returning from the taxi rank with three coats and no owner. designated survivored adj. Drunk by closing time, and the sole cabinet member still capable of forming a succession plan. Mayada was designated survivored, found upright in the hallway after the household had retired. designathonned adj. Still drunk, and treating the morning after as a collaborative event for redesigning breakfast. Maelynn was designathonned, gathering everyone round the table to improve the architecture of toast. designationed (/dɛzɪɡˈneɪʃənd/) adj. Too drunk to assign anything a name without first holding a formal ceremony for it. Cerra was designationed, giving the bedroom lamp a title and a provisional area of responsibility. designatored adj. Sufficiently drunk to appoint a representative for every object encountered on the way home. Fountain was designatored, nominating the umbrella to speak for the entire household. designatumed adj. Having drunk enough to mistake every named object for the person who named it. Thoburn was designatumed, apologising to the kettle for what the label had implied. designed (/dɪˈzaɪnd/) adj. Drunk in a way that treats every conversation as a specification whose requirements remain unmet. Meridyth was designed, issuing precise conditions under which she might consider another drink. designednessed adj. Having drunk more than intended, and now detecting deliberate arrangements in the crumbs beside the bed. Mckayden woke designednessed, certain the scattered crisps formed an instruction for the day. designeed (/ˌdɛzɪɡˈnid/) adj. You have drunk enough to regard yourself as formally selected for the morning’s unpleasant tasks. Kiandrea was designeed, accepting responsibility for the coffee without recalling the appointment. designer babied adj. Of a drinker: genetically optimised for the morning after, yet still defeated by the first cup of tea. Karana was designer babied, equipped for every conceivable ailment except the one actually present. designer dogged adj. Of a drinker who has combined two incompatible mornings and is shedding both by noon. Kaelynn was designer dogged, part sofa-bound invalid and part determined gardener before breakfast. designer drugged adj. Describing a drinker who has chemically reformulated the evening and is paying for the patent at breakfast. Chave was designer drugged, regarding the orange juice as an experimental treatment with uncertain licensing. designer dyked adj. A drinker who has reached the morning after with an unexpectedly formal certainty about nothing in particular. Mareyah was designer dyked, delivering firm conclusions about the kettle before taking tea. designer labelled adj. A drinker so far gone that yesterday’s clothes acquire a luxury brand name by breakfast. Catalea was designer labelled, describing the stained cardigan as an exclusive limited release. designer stubbled adj. The state of being drunk and presenting the morning’s uneven face as a deliberate fashion decision. Cerinity was designer stubbled, defending the unshaven appearance as carefully calibrated restraint.