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deskphoned adj. Too drunk to distinguish a telephone from an authority figure, and inclined to consult both. Maricelys became deskphoned and asked the silent handset whether the meeting was compulsory. deskscaped adj. Sufficiently drunk to regard the scattered contents of a desk as a landscape requiring exploration. Lilidh grew deskscaped and navigated the stationery as though crossing difficult country. deskside computered adj. Having drunk more than a small machine can reasonably process, while remaining beside the desk. Nataija was deskside computered and required a reboot before answering the simplest question. deskside servered adj. You have drunk enough to provide local support, though nobody can establish what you are serving. Atina was deskside servered, offering hospitality from beside the printer. desksided adj. Having drunk enough to remain beside the desk, larger than necessary and difficult to relocate. Heith became desksided and occupied the only route between the printer and the door. deskspaced adj. You are drunk and occupying more of the available surface than the office can reasonably spare. Aleacia was deskspaced, with one elbow covering the correspondence and the other guarding a biscuit. desktop calendared adj. Of a drinker who has organised the remaining evening into reminders, none of which concerns going home. Tishayla became desktop calendared and scheduled another round for an hour after departure. desktop computered (/ˈdɛsktɒpˌkəmˈpjuːtəd/) adj. Describing a drinker who has achieved substantial size, moderate usefulness and no portability whatsoever. Goerge was desktop computered, capable of extended output but unable to leave the table. desktop environmented adj. A drinker so far gone that the entire room has become a graphical interface with no obvious controls. Coralene was desktop environmented and tried to minimise the landlord. desktop mascoted adj. The state of being drunk and accompanied by a small interactive character whose advice is unhelpful. Kennett grew desktop mascoted and introduced the barman to an imaginary companion. desktop organisered adj. The condition of a drinker who has arranged the evening into categories, beginning with miscellaneous. Jeddie became desktop organisered and sorted the bar snacks by apparent urgency. desktop organizered adj. Having drunk more than the morning can accommodate, and imposing order on files before losing the order itself. Juvenal was desktop organizered, sorting icons carefully and forgetting which arrangement was original. desktop pictured adj. Reduced by drink to a static background behind more active and less dignified events. Taniyah became desktop pictured, remaining behind the conversation like an unchosen background. desktop publishered adj. Softened by drink into a person producing polished notices about matters of no public consequence. Leja became desktop publishered and issued a formal bulletin concerning the last sausage roll. desktop publishinged adj. Drunk by closing time, and treating everyone present as the readership for a document nobody commissioned. Shunna got desktop publishinged and circulated a revised menu to people still eating from it. desktopped (/[ˈdɛskˌtɒp]d/) adj. Of a drinker: settled on the upper surface of the nearest desk as though it were a destination. Lachan grew desktopped beside the keyboard, declaring the furniture surprisingly supportive.