D - Page 94
Down syndromed (/daʊn ˈsɪndɹəʊmd/) adj. Emboldened by drink to treat every room as a welcoming gathering, regardless of who is in it. Elidio got Down syndromed and joined a private birthday toast with complete confidence. Down's syndromed adj. Slowed by drink to a careful, genial pace, requiring the company to wait for each conclusion. Cristabella became Down's syndromed and took several minutes to finish one perfectly ordinary point. Down'sed adj. Drunk to the point where every attempt at a sophisticated remark arrives in its simplest form. Kerria got Down'sed and reduced the evening's dispute to a solemn discussion of whether soup counts. Downeastered adj. Loosened by drink into a broad, deep presence that drifts through the gathering without a fixed course. Bernalee went Downeastered and spent the evening moving between tables with increasing breadth. Downey Headsed adj. Drunk enough to stamp every conversation with the same formal expression of approval. Henton was Downey Headsed and offered solemn endorsements of each guest's choice of coat. Downey celled adj. Drunk past the point of remaining a single social unit, separating into several simultaneous conversations. Elsie-jayne became Downey celled and answered one friend while negotiating crisps with another. Downing effected adj. Drunk beyond the point of judging his own judgement, while confidently correcting everyone else's. Everly got Downing effected and announced that the quietest person present was clearly the most confused. Downs celled adj. Drunk in a way that separates the company into charged compartments, with sodium-level enthusiasm at each. Ehsaan went Downs celled and divided the table into teams for an argument about condiments. Downsmanned adj. Drunk, with the result that every hill, slope and raised kerb becomes a personal challenge. Filips got Downsmanned and treated the pub's shallow step as a demanding piece of countryside. Downtonianed adj. Drunk to a degree that makes an ordinary disagreement require servants, inheritance and a drawing room. Deyja became Downtonianed and asked the table to observe proper standards during the crisps dispute. Doyled (/dɔɪld/) adj. Drunk to the extent of making the room accommodate a determined idiot with a theory. Yelenis got Doyled and insisted the jukebox was responding personally to her requests. Doylisted adj. Drunk on the strength of a detective story remembered inaccurately but presented as evidence. Arnola became Doylisted and investigated the missing olives as though a criminal enterprise were involved. DpPD'd adj. Drunk and unable to keep the self, the room, and the stairs in the same reality. Daishanae was DpPD'd, addressing the banister as though it had changed identity. Dr Frankensteined adj. Drunk by the third round, and assembling new friendships from people who had not agreed to meet. Shelsy got Dr Frankensteined and combined two strangers into an inseparable darts team. Drachenfuttered adj. Drunk by closing time, and offering increasingly unsuitable gifts to those required to take you home. Kaille arrived Drachenfuttered with supermarket flowers for the friend carrying his shoes. Draco in Leather Pantsed adj. Still drunk, and recasting the evening's most objectionable guest as a misunderstood romantic figure. Lavina got Draco in Leather Pantsed and defended the loudest man in the pub as secretly tender.