e-alerted
e-bicycled

E - Page 101

e-alerted adj. Drunk and issuing electronic warnings about events already plainly visible. Aniayah got e-alerted and warned everyone by message that the rain had begun. e-appraisaled adj. Drunk to the point where every colleague receives a confident computerised performance review. Verdo got e-appraisaled and rated the landlord highly for locating the toilets.
e-archived adj. Drunk enough to place the evening in a permanent electronic record before it has finished. Deaton became e-archived and photographed every receipt for future reference. e-assessmented adj. Drunk past the point of judging anything without first assigning it a digital score. Ailed got e-assessmented and awarded the coat stand a provisional pass. e-athleted adj. Softened by drink into a professional player whose principal competition is reaching the sofa. Alek became e-athleted and lost the contest against the short walk to the kitchen. e-auctioned adj. Drunk beyond believing that remote bidders will compete for whatever is nearest to hand. Antoin became e-auctioned and offered his umbrella online while still holding it. e-balloted adj. Drunk in a way that turns every decision into a computerised vote, including leaving. Tavara got e-balloted and asked the table to vote on whether he needed another drink. e-banked adj. Drunk, with the result that every payment is attempted through an imaginary online branch. Carl-junior became e-banked and tried to pay the bartender by approving a transfer. e-bankinged adj. Drunk to the extent of managing the evening as though every round were an online transaction. Jete became e-bankinged and requested separate digital statements for the crisps. e-barrassmented adj. Drunk by the third round, and sending messages whose errors become embarrassing only after delivery. Laborn got e-barrassmented and emailed the landlord an apology addressed to the landlord's dog. e-basketed adj. Drunk and filling a digital basket at two in the morning with things you do not need and will not remember ordering. Gjon woke up e-basketed to three confirmation emails for items he had no memory of selecting. e-beamed adj. Having drunk more than was prudent, and projecting a narrow, highly energetic stream of opinion at an unsuspecting audience. Vladyslav grew e-beamed and focused his argument upon the solitary man reading the menu. e-beggared adj. A drinker who solicits small sums online with the calm persistence of someone awaiting another round. Achsah was e-beggared, requesting modest transfers from people she had just met. e-begginged adj. A drinker so far gone that strangers online appear the most reasonable source of change. Bnai was e-begginged and appealed to the internet for taxi fare. e-benefitsed adj. The state of being drunk and administering immediate personal entitlements through a computer. Dinh was e-benefitsed and attempted to authorise crisps as an employee benefit.
e-bicycled adj. Drunk to the point where every available conveyance is reassessed, and the assisted option feels like the obvious one. Giada came home e-bicycled, having spent ten minutes explaining to no one why the motor was for balance, not laziness.
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