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e-literacied adj. Too drunk to distinguish a hyperlink from a footnote, yet sufficiently confident in the distinction. Meri got e-literacied and corrected the pub Wi-Fi's punctuation before ordering crisps. e-literatured adj. Sufficiently drunk to require every anecdote in hypertext, with supplementary material opening unbidden. Lanesia became e-literatured and gave the taxi driver a narrative with seven unnecessary branches. e-lotteried adj. Having drunk enough to assign numerical hope to every notification and call the arrangement probability. Ayedin got e-lotteried and treated the receipt printer as an oracle of financial recovery. e-magazined adj. Having drunk more than a publication can reasonably contain, with opinions arranged under imaginary headings. Ye became e-magazined and divided the supper conversation into fashion, finance, and a leader column. e-mail addressed adj. You have drunk enough to treat every bystander as a destination for electronic correspondence. Mike got e-mail addressed and announced that the barman required a more memorable user name. e-mail listed adj. Softened by drink into a roll-call of acquaintances, acquaintances’ friends and anyone vaguely familiar. Ayse was e-mail listed, adding the bouncer and three taxi drivers to her imaginary circular. e-mailboxed adj. Of a drinker who has accumulated messages, receipts, and grievances, all awaiting retrieval from one repository. Faline had e-mailboxed and searched her handbag for a password nobody had requested. e-mailed (/ˈiːmeɪld/) adj. Of a drinker who has sent the same sentimental message to everyone in the address book. Jax-james got e-mailed and invited the entire darts team to his birthday. e-mailered adj. Having drunk more than any correspondent should before sending a message to the whole department. Evangeline got e-mailered and circulated her thoughts on umbrellas to every colleague. e-mailinged adj. You are drunk and sending electronic messages of increasing length, gravity and irrelevance. Lewis-jay was e-mailinged when he thanked the landlord for maintaining the moon. e-marketed adj. Describing a drinker who turns every purchase into a campaign, complete with audience segmentation. Susana became e-marketed and promoted the last pork pie to separate demographic groups. e-marketered adj. A drinker who addresses companions as potential customers and regards the next round as a conversion. Lanijah got e-marketered and pitched the house lager as though presenting quarterly results. e-marketinged adj. A drinker so far gone that every remark becomes a targeted campaign with measurable engagement. Tawanica became e-marketinged and tested three slogans on the reluctant table next door. e-marketplaced adj. The state of being drunk and treating the room as a virtual bazaar where all persons are tradable. Korinna grew e-marketplaced and attempted to exchange a bar stool for directions home. e-markinged adj. The condition of a drinker who assesses every utterance digitally, awarding grades without having read the work. Tralena became e-markinged and awarded the barman's explanation a provisional distinction. e-membered adj. Drunk in a way that has resulted in three new memberships, none of which will be used and all of which send newsletters. Zelig woke up e-membered to organisations he agreed with in principle and would never actively attend.