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face-upped adj. Too drunk to distinguish the painted doll from the landlady, and asking both for another round. Jessicca went face-upped and offered the painted doll a half of bitter. face-valued adj. Of a drinker: accepting the printed instructions on the water glass as binding domestic law. Lesle was face-valued and measured the sofa according to its cushion labels. faceached adj. Having drunk enough to appear miserable before anything has actually happened. Anna- looked faceached by half eight, though the darts had not yet begun. facebooked (/ˈfeɪsˌbʊkd/) adj. Having drunk more than a directory can reasonably contain, and recognising everyone by photograph. Erec got facebooked and began identifying regulars from imagined passport pictures. facebookered adj. Drunk on the strength of online familiarity, addressing strangers as established contacts. Arma was facebookered and asked a quiet customer why he had not liked the latest photograph. facebowed (/ˈfeɪsbəʊd/) adj. You have drunk enough to measure every smile against an imaginary dental appliance. Kendrel became facebowed and adjusted his grin before each visit to the bar. facebricked adj. Drunk by closing time, and built for display rather than inspection when morning arrives. Zhoe was facebricked, maintaining a handsome front while searching unsuccessfully for yesterday. facebustered adj. You are drunk and arriving at the carpet with the confidence of a wrestler. Jitesh went facebustered beside the settle, missing the cushion by several inches. facecamed adj. Of a drinker who has turned the evening into a live close-up of every thought. Jamarrius got facecamed and gave the camera a solemn review of each pork pie. facecared adj. Describing a drinker who applies pub napkins as though they were an entire cosmetic regime. Jedaiah went facecared with a damp napkin and the concentration of a salon customer. faceclaimed adj. Having drunk enough to cast the morning's familiar faces in roles they have not agreed to play. Kemareon was faceclaimed, insisting the exhausted cashier looked exactly like a television detective. faceclothed adj. A drinker who treats a damp flannel as suitable evening wear for the head. Hearl, faceclothed, emerged from the lavatory ready to rejoin the dominoes. facecrimed adj. A drinker so far gone that the expression alone constitutes an offence against the room. Dwyane looked facecrimed while silently judging the choice of music. faced (/feɪsd/) adj. Drunk in a way that leaves the morning written plainly across the front of the head. Quamayne was faced before coffee, carrying the night openly beneath both eyes. facedowned adj. A drinker who has reduced the evening to a confrontation between forehead and carpet. Shelbea was facedowned in the sitting room, having lost the argument with the rug. facefucked adj. The condition of a drinker who has surrendered all facial composure to the public house. Genora got facefucked and smiled at the wrong end of the dartboard.