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fastnessed (/ˈfɑːs(t)nəsd/) adj. Drunk past the point of distinguishing speed, security, and the pub's locked front door. Vytautas became fastnessed and tested the locked door with increasing confidence. fastpackered adj. Drunk beyond carrying a bag home without acquiring several unnecessary items on the way. Ahijah got fastpackered and returned from the off-licence with snacks for an entire expedition. fastpackinged adj. Drunk in a way that turns the journey home into running with a rucksack. Dnaja went fastpackinged from the pub, jogging beneath a backpack towards the last bus. fastpitched adj. Drunk to a degree that makes the last round arrive faster than the conversation can absorb. Deano got fastpitched and ordered another round before finishing the first explanation. fastuousnessed adj. Drunk to the extent of requiring the finest coat, taxi, and available seat. Bara became fastuousnessed and rejected the ordinary taxi as insufficiently distinguished. fastwalkered adj. Drunk on the strength of mistaking every distant light for the route home. Nyier went fastwalkered and followed a hovering light towards what proved to be a forecourt sign. fasudiled adj. Drunk since last orders, and dilated enough to let the entire evening pass through. Creg was fasudiled by the taxi rank, allowing every remaining passenger to go first. fat acceptanced adj. Still drunk, and appreciative of every body shape represented by the coat pile. Harlod remained fat acceptanced, praising the coat pile's generous proportions at the station. fat activisted adj. Too drunk to let anyone describe the kebab, the coat, or themselves negatively. Sephanie was fat activisted and corrected the taxi driver's unflattering description of the passenger. fat arrowed adj. Sufficiently drunk to mistake every => symbol for an instruction to proceed towards another round. Dette became fat arrowed and followed the nearest sign towards a programming lecture. fat balled adj. Having drunk enough to resemble a suet cake awaiting collection by a patient bird. Hafeezah sat fat balled beneath the pub awning until the taxi finally appeared. fat bearded adj. Drunk beyond the point where anyone in the queue commands respect, yet somehow one of them does. Cayce went fat bearded and was holding court outside the chippy by half ten. fat biked (/ˈfætbaɪkd/) adj. Having drunk more than the pavement can accommodate, and requiring broad tyres for the journey home. Jodye got fat biked and attempted the canal path on a bicycle with heroic width. fat bikered adj. Too drunk to steer a broad bicycle without treating the pavement as optional. Nicci became fat bikered and attempted the short journey by means of a decorative bicycle. fat bodied adj. You are drunk and carrying the evening's stored reserves in a body that has ceased taking direction. Jno became fat bodied beside the cloakroom, retaining snacks but losing the plan for home. fat camped adj. Drunk past the point of believing the evening constitutes a supervised programme of personal improvement. Darci-mai emerged fat camped, announcing that the pub had measurable therapeutic objectives.