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femoxetined adj. Describing a drinker who has chemically flattened the evening while remaining oddly conversational. Darryal got femoxetined and discussed the beer garden with serene, pharmaceutical composure. femslashed adj. A drinker so far gone that every exchange between women becomes a romantic plotline. Amerson got femslashed and treated the two women sharing crisps as star-crossed lovers. femslashered adj. The state of being drunk and enthusiastically assigning female characters to one another in spirit. Meshel got femslashered and paired every woman in the pub before the quiz began. femspeaked adj. The condition of a drinker who has replaced ordinary pub talk with a vocabulary of causes and discourse. femsplainered adj. Drunk since last orders, and explaining the mechanics of everyone else's balance. Savannahjo got femsplainered and demonstrated the correct way to descend stairs to the handrail. femsplaininged adj. The drunkenness of one who explains feminism to a man who has plainly asked about the football. Keydren got femsplaininged and lectured the quietest man in the saloon about representation. femstruationed adj. Reduced by drink to a monthly cycle of leaving the pub, returning for one more, and beginning again. Hanni got femstruationed and followed the same cycle from the bar to the pavement all night. femsubed adj. Drunk by the third round, and yielding to suggestions with the solemnity of a constitutional settlement. femsymped adj. Drunk by closing time, and defending feminist principles to the urinal attendant. Esteve got femsymped and delivered a serious account of workplace equality to the coat stand. femteched (/ˈfɛmtɛkd/) adj. Still drunk, and treating the bathroom scale as a major advance in reproductive healthcare. Bavneet became femteched and demonstrated the bathroom scales to Marck as though unveiling a medical breakthrough. femto-photographied adj. A drinker who records every glance, gesture and departure before anyone else has noticed them. Raelyne was femto-photographied throughout the evening, archiving every glance before the crisps arrived. femtoampered adj. Too drunk to generate even a quadrillionth of an ampere, but still attempting to power the karaoke machine. Ilay was femtoampered and could not persuade the karaoke machine to illuminate its smallest indicator. femtobarned adj. Sufficiently drunk to occupy a quadrillionth of a barn, yet somehow obstruct the entire doorway. Domanik became femtobarned and claimed the narrowest possible territory while blocking everyone leaving. femtobecquerelled adj. Having drunk enough to exhibit one quadrillionth of a disintegration per second, chiefly in the biscuit aisle. Janielis was femtobecquerelled and required several minutes to decide whether the biscuits were radioactive. femtobelled adj. Having drunk more than a quadrillionth of a bel, and consequently announcing the score to strangers. femtocached adj. You have drunk enough to store a quadrillionth-scale suburb of mobile signals in your jacket pocket. Emmelie became femtocached and searched her pocket for the wireless network she believed she had brought.