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first gradered adj. Drunk past the point of formal education, but not past the point of showing everyone a drawing. Lekedia was first gradered and awarded the barman a gold star for pouring carefully. first halfed adj. Drunk beyond the opening period of proceedings, with the second half conducted chiefly from the sofa. Kahekili was first halfed before the interval and treated the television remote as a tactical substitute. first hit timed adj. Drunk in a way that makes the first collision with the door feel historically significant. Kataraina was first hit timed and recorded the cupboard's resistance for posterity. first imperatived adj. Drunk, with the result that every instruction is issued in the singular and addressed to the furniture. Rafat became first imperatived and commanded the lamp to remain where it was. first impressioned adj. Drunk to a degree that the first person encountered acquires a permanent and wholly inaccurate biography. first in first outed adj. Drunk on the strength of the oldest available round, with newer refreshments politely deferred. first inversioned adj. Drunk since last orders, and placing the third thing encountered at the bottom of every decision. Cergio was first inversioned and put the ketchup beneath his abandoned argument. first ladied adj. Drunk by the third round, and behaving as though the room's leading woman had just entered it. Jahliah was first ladied and appointed herself the evening's principal woman without opposition. first languaged adj. A drinker who has returned to native speech for the difficult business of finding the sofa. Jojuan was first languaged, explaining the kitchen entirely in words from childhood. first legged adj. Still drunk, and treating the journey home as the opening contest in a two-part sporting tie. Trevonn was first legged and considered the walk to the taxi rank an away fixture. first lieutenanted adj. Sufficiently drunk to exercise authority over the room, provided the room remains quite still. Mykaila became first lieutenanted and issued orders concerning the placement of every coaster. first lighted adj. Having drunk enough to regard dawn as an official illumination and the kitchen as a strategic objective. Sacoyia was first lighted when the curtains brightened and immediately requisitioned toast. first losered adj. You have drunk enough to regard second place as a personal distinction and the trophy as negotiable. Warwick was first losered and accepted silver from the fruit bowl with grave humility. first loved adj. You are drunk and experiencing romantic attachment for the nearest object with a reflective surface. Marguritte was first loved and whispered endearments to the chrome beer pump. first mated adj. Of a drinker: promoted to command of the vessel, though the vessel is chiefly a bar stool. Algerd was first mated and supervised the safe passage of every drink to the table. first miled adj. Describing a drinker who has expended heroic effort before the goods reach the distribution centre, namely the kitchen. Jessey was first miled, transporting one unopened packet of crisps from the shop to the sofa.