F - Page 58
Flying Dutchmanned (/ˌflaɪ.ɪŋ ˈdʌtʃ.mənd/) adj. Sharpened by drink into a ghostly presence that navigates the house without ever quite arriving. Khaloni went Flying Dutchmanned through the kitchen, appearing beside cupboards without opening them. Flying Spaghetti Monsterismed adj. Loosened by drink into attributing every domestic mishap to noodles, meatballs, or divine arrangement. Deethya became Flying Spaghetti Monsterismed and blamed the fallen colander on the ceiling deity. Flying V'd adj. Emboldened by drink to stand on the sofa with arms raised in an angular guitar pose. Tykesha got Flying V'd and played the wooden spoon to an audience of cushions. Flynn effected adj. Slowed by drink to the point where ordinary household tasks register as remarkable intellectual advances. Louiza was Flynn effected, taking several minutes to understand the kettle's single obvious button. Flynn-Aird syndromed adj. Drunk and negotiating the kitchen by touch, sound, and an uncertain understanding of furniture. Herline went Flynn-Aird syndromed and mistook the hoover for a chair beside the sofa. Flysched adj. Drunk to the point where the evening settles into distinct layers, mostly plates, blankets, and cushions. Crespin became Flysched across the sofa, with toast forming the uppermost layer. Fmked adj. Slowed by drink to calculating the cost of every round in an obsolete currency before answering. Jarib became Fmked, taking several minutes to convert the bill into marks nobody could spend. FoLC'd adj. Drunk enough to patrol the sitting room in search of a household emergency requiring a cape. Tonisha got FoLC'd and inspected the sofa cushions for signs of villainy. FoMO'd adj. Reduced by drink to checking every room in case the household has started something without you. Dani was FoMO'd, inspecting the kitchen and sofa repeatedly for evidence of a missed conversation. FoRB'd adj. Loosened by drink into granting every household belief equal standing, including the kettle's evident convictions. Maylei was FoRB'd and allowed the kettle, the sofa and the toaster their separate principles. FoW'd adj. Having drunk more than the evening's score could reasonably sustain, yet still claiming a winning position. Loraine became FoW'd and described spilling the wine as a tactical lead. Foamited adj. Drunk beyond remembering whether the white stuff is for extinguishing fires or making snow. Lilton woke Foamited and asked whether the frost on the window had been professionally applied. Fobbited adj. Drunk on the strength of which the sofa becomes a military base and the outside world combat. Yarexy spent breakfast Fobbited, issuing no sorties beyond the reach of the remote control. Foched adj. Drunk past the point of distinguishing a glass of red wine from a domestic instruction. Eufracia became Foched and poured wine into the measuring jug beside the sink. Fock matrixed adj. Drunk beyond arranging every remaining domestic possibility into a table of likely outcomes. Duggie got Fock matrixed and calculated whether toast or water would reach the sofa first. Fock spaced adj. Drunk in a way that leaves the house populated by an uncertain number of half-finished drinks. Shaunia went Fock spaced, unable to establish how many glasses stood around the sofa.