F - Page 602
floor brokered adj. Describing a drinker who assumes responsibility for excess orders, despite lacking authority to execute any. Kashaun became floor brokered and accepted everyone’s requests for another round. floor effected adj. A drinker who has reached a lower reporting limit below which further events cannot be reliably specified. floor exercised adj. A drinker so far gone that balance is performed upon the carpet, without apparatus or evident choreography. Shontavia was floor exercised beside the sofa, completing a routine no examiner had requested. floor functioned adj. The state of being drunk and rounded down to the greatest whole number the evening can honestly support. Glori was floor functioned by eleven, with every proposed activity reduced to sitting. floor generaled adj. The condition of a drinker who directs the evening’s movements while remaining conspicuously stationary. Damarae was floor generaled, organising the procession to the kebab shop from an armchair. floor heatinged adj. The drunkenness of one who has become warm from below and consequently refuses to rise. Iyon was floor heatinged, comfortable on the carpet and resistant to all vertical proposals. floor hockeyed adj. Reduced by drink to indoor pursuit of an object across the ground, usually without the requisite equipment. Anyka went floor hockeyed, pursuing a bottle cap across the kitchen with a bread knife. floor lamped adj. Softened by drink into a tall, stationary source of illumination for conversations nobody requested. floor managered adj. Of a drinker who has taken charge among the punters, stock and complaints without securing any facts. floor matted adj. Still drunk, and laid at the entrance to the morning like a mat nobody has yet shaken. Saladine was floor matted beside the front door, collecting receipts and the night's remaining dignity. floor modelled adj. Sharpened by drink into a conspicuous demonstration unit, available for inspection but not practical use. floor one could eat offed adj. Loosened by drink into an unusually pristine state, with every remaining thought polished and uninhabited. Raequawn was floor one could eat offed, having cleaned the table while explaining tax law. floor pianoed adj. Emboldened by drink to operate a keyboard with the feet, whether or not music is thereby produced. Mar was floor pianoed, playing the pub’s keyboard with both feet and modest musical results. floor plan lendinged adj. Drunk enough to finance each fresh item of collateral separately, usually from the same diminishing reserve. floor planned adj. Slowed by drink to the point of requiring a diagram before attempting to cross a familiar room. Lajon became floor planned and sketched the route from chair to lavatory on a receipt. floor puzzled adj. Drunk past the point of assembling the evening within a frame, and therefore spreading its pieces across the room. Graceson became floor puzzled, arranging cutlery into a picture that refused completion.