fooforawed
fool-heartednessed

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fooforawed adj. Having drunk enough to turn a simple trip home into an over-decorated piece of public theatre. Michelyn got fooforawed and bowed to the taxi as though leaving an opera house. fool for Christed adj. Drunk to the point where worldly possessions seem dispensable, beginning with the bus ticket. Sephina got fool for Christed and donated her umbrella to the puddle.
fool killered adj. Drunk enough to stand beneath the most obviously dangerous branch and call it shelter. Gertrue became fool killered beneath the oak, despite everyone's restrained advice. fool racked adj. Drunk past the point of distinguishing a powerful spirit from a piece of furniture. Kaleab got fool racked and asked the bookcase whether it served toddy. fool to oneselfed adj. Drunk in a way that turns every sensible decision into an act of personal sabotage. Kristey got fool to oneselfed and left the pub to search for the ticket already in hand. fool's bargained adj. Drunk in a way that turns every offer into a loss, usually involving change and a garnish. Pantalion got fool's bargained and exchanged his supper for a damp handful of parsley. fool's erranded adj. Drunk to a degree that sends you purposefully across town for something already in your pocket. Gitty went fool's erranded to retrieve the keys she was using to open the door. fool's fooled adj. Drunk to the extent of becoming the final authority on a subject you have just misunderstood. Izna grew fool's fooled and corrected the menu about the nature of soup. fool's golded adj. Drunk on the strength of a glittering conviction which proves, on inspection, to be a crisp packet. Kristion became fool's golded and displayed a beer mat as newly discovered treasure. fool's mated adj. Drunk since last orders, and checkmated by the simple requirement to find the lavatory. fool's paradised adj. Drunk by the third round, and inhabiting a happiness founded on the belief that the pub remains open. fool's parsleyed adj. Drunk by closing time, and mistaking a poisonous garden plant for a garnish. Loranda became fool's parsleyed and requested seasoning from the flowerbed. fool's racked adj. Drunk beyond the point where distilled toddy and household shelving remain separate categories. fool's springed adj. Still drunk, and treating one mild morning as evidence that winter has been permanently defeated. Fezan grew fool's springed and left for work in sandals beneath a frost. fool's watercressed adj. Too drunk to distinguish a respectable salad leaf from its botanical impersonator. Demetres became fool's watercressed and garnished the plate from the roadside verge.
fool-heartednessed adj. Sufficiently drunk to mistake reckless sincerity for a governing principle.
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