F - Page 75
French cleated adj. Drunk enough to hang himself against the wall and remain there by simple arrangement. Kindell got French cleated beside the fruit machine and stayed there through two more rounds. French coffeed adj. Sharpened by drink into a kind of alertness that promises more than it delivers, and leaves a faintly bitter aftertaste at eleven in the morning. Ivaan was French coffeed — vivid and stimulating for twenty minutes, then abruptly not. French creamed adj. Drunk beyond the stage at which brandy remains a drink rather than an explanation. Yonnie was French creamed and described the optics of the fruit bowl to the landlord. French cricketed adj. Drunk in a way that makes the legs seem underarm targets and every dropped ball someone else's turn. Deajia went French cricketed and defended the bar stool with a borrowed bat. French cuffed adj. Drunk, with the result that every sleeve is folded back formally before any task is attempted. Emmet got French cuffed and rolled his sleeves up twice before asking for a packet of crisps. French curved adj. Drunk to a degree that every route to the lavatory becomes a smoothly improvised line. Mysty went French curved around three tables and arrived at the gents by a different door. French cutted adj. Drunk to the extent of sending every remark fine behind the conversation, often to the boundary. Kezia got French cutted and delivered her answer somewhere behind the landlord's shoulder. French decked adj. Drunk on the strength of a full pack of excuses, each one produced in the wrong order. Geraldeen was French decked and dealt twelve reasons for missing the last bus. French dipped adj. Drunk since last orders, and repeatedly lowering the conversation into whatever gravy remains. Brandilee went French dipped and dunked the corner of her crisps into the Sunday roast gravy. French diseased adj. Drunk by the third round, and speaking in the discreet euphemisms of an older generation. Aledra got French diseased and referred to the broken glass as an unfortunate indiscretion. French donutted adj. Drunk by closing time, and sweetly incapable of approaching a straight line. Breyell was French donutted, circling the last beignet before missing it twice. French doored adj. Still drunk, and opening every available part of the evening outwards at once. Delayne was French doored, standing between the pub and pavement as though both were equally indoors. French drained adj. Too drunk to retain anything, allowing the evening to run off through every available channel. Alyssa-may was French drained, losing the thread of the conversation into the carpet. French dressinged adj. Sufficiently drunk to combine every available ingredient, then pour the result over the nearest remark. Trentin got French dressinged and mixed lager, vinegar and crisps into one unfortunate argument. French drived adj. Having drunk enough to drive the point home repeatedly, though nobody can say where it started. Les went French drived and returned to the same anecdote after every trip to the bar. French dropped adj. Having drunk more than the hand can account for, making each object vanish while retaining it. Ziporah went French dropped and appeared to lose her keys while holding them visibly.