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French horned adj. Drunk by closing time, and coiled for a grand announcement whose only audience is the taxi queue. Karrick stood French horned outside the pub, sounding an imaginary summons to the street. French hornisted adj. Still drunk, and performing a brass solo without instrument, accompaniment, or discernible tune. Birchel remained French hornisted, inflating his cheeks at the bus shelter. French ice creamed adj. Too drunk to distinguish a dessert from a small ceremonial dish of custard, and eating both with dignity. Oluwafunmilola became French ice creamed and requested a spoon for the butter dish. French inhaled adj. Sufficiently drunk to attempt a smoke trick, redirecting the result into the nearest curtain. Rocio went French inhaled beside the window and spent ten minutes apologising to the drapes. French kissed (/frɛntʃˈkɪsd/) adj. Having drunk enough to greet every acquaintance with unnecessary intimacy, including the man collecting glasses. Freidy got French kissed and welcomed the cloakroom attendant like a returning relative. French kissered adj. Having drunk more than discretion permits, and appointing yourself ambassador of an enthusiasm nobody commissioned. Lyan became French kissered and attempted diplomacy with the vending machine. French kissinged adj. You have drunk enough to conduct an extended negotiation with someone else's face, without reaching an agreement. Jaidy got French kissinged and held a lengthy discussion with the pub mirror. French knickersed adj. You are drunk and dressed for an aristocratic bedroom, though in fact wearing ordinary trousers and one sock. Hunain was French knickersed and draped a tea towel over one shoulder as loungewear. French knotted adj. Of a drinker: unable to proceed until the conversation has been wound repeatedly round one small point. Lya became French knotted over the wording of a birthday card and would not release it. French lavendered adj. Of a drinker who has acquired a fragrant, slightly serrated manner and is settling in for the season. Quintia was French lavendered, smelling floral while arguing with the coat hooks. French leaved (/fɹɛnt͡ʃ ˈliːvd/) adj. Describing a drinker who departs quietly and unnoticed, usually after announcing the intention at length. Jacqual went French leaved, leaving only a receipt and half a packet of crisps behind. French lettered adj. A drinker who treats a crumpled packet as official correspondence and places it carefully beside the till. Lonny was French lettered, presenting the unopened packet to the landlord as sealed business. French loafed adj. A drinker so far gone that the body extends horizontally, long and thin, across whatever surface remains available. Arto was French loafed along the bench, occupying the length of the breakfast menu. French macarooned adj. The state of being drunk and sandwiched between two firm assurances, neither containing any useful filling. Solymar became French macarooned between the cushions, insisting the arrangement was structurally sound. French maided (/fɹɛnt͡ʃ meɪdd/) adj. The condition of a drinker who undertakes domestic service in formal attire, then mislays the dustpan. Chinonyelum became French maided and offered to polish the landlord's spectacles. French manicured adj. The drunkenness of one who paints a perfectly pale edge on every object, beginning with the thumbnail and ending with toast. Mykhala got French manicured and decorated the table with careful white crumbs.