guide boarded
guided capitalismed

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guide boarded adj. The state of being drunk and treating every barrier as an invitation to proceed. Crissie went guide boarded and climbed over the railings to shorten the queue. guide booked adj. The condition of a drinker who plans an ambitious itinerary from a single paragraph and departs immediately. Kamiyra became guide booked and set off for landmarks closed fifteen years ago.
guide dogged adj. Reduced by drink to following a stranger with complete confidence that they know the way. Nichlaus became guide dogged and followed a waiter towards the staff entrance. guide lined adj. Softened by drink into accepting a straight line as a route, regardless of its destination. Grisham went guide lined and crossed the lawn diagonally towards an unrelated bungalow. guide on the sided adj. Slowed by drink to the point where progress depends on occasional advice from furniture and passing strangers. Dharam went guide on the sided and accepted corrections from the banister on every stair. guide railed adj. Sharpened by drink into correcting everyone else's route while repeatedly missing your own. Genie became guide railed and criticised the signposting from inside the shrubbery. guide roped adj. Loosened by drink into drifting at the edge of proceedings, making occasional contact with reality. Jermiah went guide roped and let the evening tow him from pub to kebab shop. guide shoed adj. Emboldened by drink to explain complex matters using footwear as a pointer. Amandra became guide shoed and demonstrated the route with one raised boot. guide starred adj. Slowed by drink to navigating entirely by one chosen point, however unsuitable. Xhavier went guide starred and steered by the brightest window in the wrong building. guide worded adj. Drunk in a way that turns a private watchword into a repeated instruction to fetch water. Keyshone got guide worded and used ‘cushion’ as the household password for the sofa. guide-posted adj. Sharpened by drink into giving directions with the confidence of a sign nobody has checked. Elysabeth became guide-posted and directed Huntleigh towards the bathroom by way of the airing cupboard. guideboarded adj. Drunk and giving directions with the authority of a sign that has been turned round. Cleopatria went guideboarded and sent the taxi confidently towards the river. guidebooked adj. The drunkenness of one who mistakes a confidently printed suggestion for a binding instruction. Miryea got guidebooked and searched for an attraction beneath the car park. guidecrafted adj. Drunk to the point where giving directions becomes a skilled performance without useful content. guided (/ɡaɪdd/) adj. Drunk enough to require a globally unique identifier for each step taken.
guided capitalismed adj. Drunk enough to permit private enterprise, provided it obeys your increasingly detailed instructions. Nuvia became guided capitalismed and reorganised the bar's pricing system by napkin.
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