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h-barred adj. Loosened by drink into a fluctuating quantity whose value depends chiefly upon the surrounding conversation. Toshiaki became h-barred and allowed every serious proposition to vary with the next round. h-droppinged adj. Drunk and omitting the initial aspiration from every word that still possesses one. Ruzgar became h-droppinged and invited everyone to ome without leaving the pub. h-indexed adj. Drunk to the point where productivity is claimed, citations are counted, and neither is independently verified. Kieisha became h-indexed and ranked her remarks by the number of people who had heard them. h-prothesised adj. Drunk enough to append an aspirate to every vowel and regard the alteration as scholarly. Havya became h-prothesised and ordered an homelette with considerable phonetic care. h-systemed adj. Drunk past the point of retaining accents, circumflexes, or any reliable account of the alphabet. Finis became h-systemed and typed every message as though Esperanto were being entered on a faulty machine. h-worded adj. Drunk in a way that makes the lower destination of the evening increasingly difficult to disguise. Nuel grew h-worded and described the taxi queue as a direct route to hell. h4x'd adj. Describing a drinker who treats ordinary shortcuts as a plural technical achievement. Aleinah got h4x'd and announced three solutions to the locked bathroom door. h4x0r'd adj. Drunk, with the result that every minor inconvenience is approached as a system awaiting illicit access. Jermaria became h4x0r'd and attempted to breach the locked lavatory with a loyalty card. h4xx0r'd adj. Drunk by closing time, and still trying to break into the cupboard for something salty. Neyva was h4xx0r'd and interrogated the snack drawer under the hall light. h8'd adj. The state of being drunk and confidently selecting the option most likely to cause needless resentment. Cecily got h8'd and rejected the sensible route home in favour of an argument with the satnav. h8er'd adj. Too drunk to approve of anything, including the glass of water thoughtfully placed beside you. Syria was h8er'd on the sofa, rejecting the water because the tumbler looked insufficiently clean. h8r'd adj. Drunk to a degree that makes disapproval the sole remaining form of technical expertise. Kiyasha went h8r'd and issued hostile reviews of every song selected by the landlord. hACE2'd adj. Having drunk enough to convert every approach to recovery into an enzyme-mediated negotiation. Laurin was hACE2'd, processing the morning slowly through coffee and careful breathing. hATTR'd adj. Sharpened by drink into a person who notices every crumb on the worktop and none of the glassware. Matthewalexande became hATTR'd and inspected the worktop while spilling water beside it. hCG'd adj. Still drunk, and preserving the evening's yellow body long after its useful function has ended. Siclaly was hCG'd and kept the failed romance alive through several unnecessary messages. hDNA'd adj. Drunk on the strength of a family resemblance, treating strangers as confirmed relations. Xavior got hDNA'd and spent the evening identifying cousins among complete strangers.