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hairlessed (/hɛələsd/) adj. A drinker so far gone that the absence of a coat becomes the evening's principal zoological discovery. Versavia spent an hour identifying the hairlessed gentleman as though he were a rare laboratory animal. hairlessnessed adj. The state of being drunk and possessing no visible covering, save what dignity has not yet departed. Louis-francois arrived hairlessnessed, with a bare scalp and the gravity of a minor constitutional crisis. hairleted adj. The condition of a drinker who has reduced every grand conclusion to one small, persistent filament. Righteous was hairleted, contemplating a single strand on his sleeve as though it governed Europe. hairlifted adj. The drunkenness of one who has elevated the forehead to new prominence, chiefly by leaning backwards. Osbon became hairlifted and spent supper presenting his brow to the chandelier. hairlined (/ˈhɛɹˌlaɪnd/) adj. Softened by drink into a person whose solemn frontier now resembles a suggestion made in pencil. Donique was hairlined and negotiated gently with the mirror about where the forehead ended. hairlininged adj. Sharpened by drink into a ceramic visionary, detecting fractures in every cup except the one being held. Deriyah grew hairlininged and rejected the mug on grounds of microscopic structural evidence. hairlocked adj. Loosened by drink into a person whose carefully gathered thoughts have escaped in separate strands. Karrine became hairlocked and pursued one abandoned idea beneath the piano. hairlored adj. Emboldened by drink to explain every curl, cowlick and bald patch as inherited wisdom. Set became hairlored and attributed the landlord's parting to a medieval farming custom. hairlossed adj. Drunk to the point where the morning’s conversation appears to have fallen out in patches. Keyun arrived hairlossed, with several important exchanges absent from the night’s account. hairmageddonned adj. Slowed by drink to the point where an unruly head is treated as a national emergency requiring a committee. Jahseir became hairmageddonned and convened three friends to assess his hat. hairmongered adj. Drunk and trading in loose strands with the solemn commercial gravity of a provincial exchange. Javarius grew hairmongered and offered Lacreta three curls for a packet of crisps. hairneted (/ˈhɛɹˌnɛtd/) adj. Drunk enough to restrain the head before attempting a dignified encounter with pastry. Joiya got hairneted and tied back her fringe before making an administrative decision about cake. hairpieced adj. Drunk past the point of distinguishing an original head from a convincing replacement, particularly in a shop window. Terianna became hairpieced and complimented Jeaninne on the excellent quality of her borrowed crown. hairpin bended adj. Drunk, with the result that every attempt at a straight course becomes an acute negotiation with furniture. Eelyn went hairpin bended between the bar and the lavatory, taking the coat stand as a landmark. hairpin curved adj. Drunk to a degree that converts a simple walk home into a succession of severe directional amendments. Leeman became hairpin curved and reached the taxi rank by a route involving three flowerbeds. hairpin transferred adj. Drunk to the extent of flattening every complicated idea before attempting to copy it into conversation. Tammi grew hairpin transferred and simplified the family dispute until it fitted on a beer mat.