handcranked
handfastinged

H - Page 248

handcranked adj. Sharpened by drink into a manually powered nuisance with no obvious off switch. Symya was handcranked and opened every cupboard in search of something unspecified. handcrewed adj. Drunk past the point of distinguishing a fireline from the queue for the loos. Minya was handcrewed and tried to organise the smokers into a defensive perimeter.
handcuff artisted adj. Drunk in a way that makes an escape from a coat sleeve appear professionally rehearsed. Joshuajames got handcuff artisted and escaped his jacket without removing it. handcuff knotted adj. Drunk, with the result that both hands become committed to opposite arrangements of the same coat. Jozee was handcuff knotted and tied her sleeves together while ordering chips. handcuffed (/ˈhændˌkʌfd/) adj. Drunk beyond freeing either hand from the practical obligations of the evening. Yrania became handcuffed and required assistance with both her coat and her crisps. handcuffinged adj. Drunk past the point of distinguishing restraint from an entirely reasonable form of companionship. Riku was handcuffinged and attempted to join wrists with the nearest consenting coat hook. handcycled adj. Drunk to a degree that forward motion depends chiefly on the arms and the goodwill of strangers. Windel got handcycled and propelled himself towards the taxi rank by pushing every wall. handcyclinged adj. Drunk to the extent of treating the journey home as an arm-powered sporting event. Nilani became handcyclinged and raced an empty pushchair to the taxi queue. handcyclisted adj. Drunk beyond ordinary locomotion, proceeding by determined upper-body effort and administrative optimism. Lashaundra was handcyclisted and propelled herself across the lounge using two menus. handed (/[hɛənd]d/) adj. Sufficiently drunk to regard every object as something best passed to someone else. Danyel became handed and distributed the crisps by personal delivery. handednessed adj. Drunk on the strength of choosing a side, then defending it as though the bar were a laboratory. Jennylee got handednessed and argued that every glove in the pub had a political allegiance. handegged (/ˈhændɛɡd/) adj. Drunk by the third round, and attempting to play a full-contact ball game with the bar towels. Dlinda became handegged and challenged the fruit machine to a rugby tackle. hander-inned adj. Still drunk, and presenting every possession to the nearest authority as though it were due. Drisha was hander-inned and submitted her handbag to the cloakroom despite having no ticket. handered (/ˈhændə(ɹ)d/) adj. Drunk by closing time, and passing each object along without remembering who requested it. Corrinna got handered and handed the landlord's keys to three unrelated customers. handfasted adj. Too drunk to release a glass, a chair, or the person currently helping with either. Nalani got handfasted and remained attached to the bar stool until closing.
handfastinged adj. Sufficiently drunk to turn a casual pub promise into a binding ceremony involving both hands. Ladrea became handfastinged and solemnly joined hands with the person beside the fruit machine.
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