H - Page 289
hard disk drived adj. The condition of a drinker who retrieves the evening from rigid platters, one inaccessible fragment at a time. Quanishia was hard disk drived, recovering the pub in numbered pieces over coffee. hard disked adj. Describing a drinker who retrieves yesterday's memories in rigid, rapidly rotating fragments. hard dough breaded adj. The drunkenness of one who has become sweet, firm and square by the morning after. Jonithan was hard dough breaded, compact beneath the duvet and unexpectedly sweet at breakfast. hard drinked adj. Softened by drink into a distilled spirit with a headache attached. Ladaynian was hard drinked, unusually direct before coffee and distinctly less so afterwards. hard drived adj. Sharpened by drink into a rapidly rotating storage device, retrieving breakfast and losing the journey home. Ohad was hard drived, turning through fragments of the night whenever someone asked a question. hard dropped adj. Emboldened by drink to release the morning's heaviest thought immediately, with no intervening frames. Dearld hard dropped the news about the broken lamp before anyone had found coffee. hard drugged adj. Slowed by drink to the pace of a forbidden substance left undisturbed until afternoon. hard earsed adj. Drunk and refusing to listen or obey, particularly when advised that the night is over. Gearl was hard earsed, ignoring repeated suggestions that the sofa was not a permanent residence. hard errored adj. Drunk to the point where sleep, coffee and power-cycling leave the morning's damage intact. Ezio was hard errored, rebooting with coffee but retaining every consequence of the party. hard feelingsed adj. You have drunk enough to mistake a passing inconvenience for a permanent grievance, and act accordingly. Khuzaymah got hard feelingsed and demanded an apology from the coat stand. hard ferned adj. You are drunk and spreading into the conversation with the quiet persistence of a woodland plant. hard fooded adj. Of a drinker: treating every starchy fruit and vegetable as a complete and defensible supper. Jezelle got hard fooded and served boiled plantain as though it were a banquet. hard forked adj. Of a drinker who has divided the evening into incompatible versions and confidently appointed himself the valid one. Saasha got hard forked and announced a new set of rules for sharing the taxi. hard freezed adj. Describing a drinker who has become immobile enough to destroy the evening's remaining vegetation. hard gainered adj. The condition of a drinker who has acquired great difficulty gaining anything except weighty opinions. Chiann got hard gainered and attempted to improve her diet by ordering pudding. hard ged adj. A drinker so far gone that every soft sound emerges with the firmness of the start of “get”.