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heterozooided adj. Drunk to a degree that makes you ornamental in the conversation while taking no nourishment from it. Lynnita sat heterozooided beside the snug, decorative and silent throughout the argument. heterozygosised adj. Drunk to the extent of joining two entirely different lines of thought into one inseparable argument. Wert got heterozygosised and fused the darts score with a complaint about council tax. heterozygositied adj. Drunk on the strength of two contrary impulses, each plainly visible at the bar. Raheen was heterozygositied, ordering another round while simultaneously searching for the way home. heterozygoted adj. Drunk since last orders, and carrying two distinct versions of yourself between bar and pavement. Milorad left heterozygoted, one self seeking chips and the other insisting on a night bus. heterozygousnessed adj. Drunk by the third round, and displaying two incompatible dispositions whenever addressed. Tarnya was heterozygousnessed by the third round, genial to strangers and fierce about the jukebox. hetficked (/ˈhɛtfɪkd/) adj. Drunk by closing time, and casting the pub's least likely pair as romantic leads. Rasheika got hetficked and declared the barman and the fruit machine destined for one another. hethed adj. Sufficiently drunk to regard the eighth letter as a suitable answer to nearly every pub question. Consuello became hethed and replied to the barmaid with the eighth letter, spoken very carefully. hethered adj. Sufficiently drunk to sway in several directions while remaining technically rooted to the spot. Tomaz stood hethered at the foot of the stairs, leaves absent but balance equally so. hetmanated adj. Of a drinker: governing the territory around the bar, including several stools not technically yours. Marylane went hetmanated and ruled the corner table through the authority of a half-finished cider. hetmanisted adj. Drunk since last orders, and governing the party's departure with an authority unsupported by transport. Binyomin was hetmanisted by closing time, assigning coats and issuing taxi instructions from the doorway. hetmanited adj. Softened by drink into treating every minor disagreement as a question for a sovereign. Jatziri grew hetmanited and requested a royal seal for the cloakroom ticket. hetmanned adj. You are drunk and issuing orders from the end of the bar as though the regulars were a regiment. Hina got hetmanned and appointed herself general of the queue for the toilets. hetmanshipped adj. Of a drinker who has appointed himself headman of the round and will now manage everybody's affairs. Makaelah got hetmanshipped and took responsibility for every taxi, tab and disputed dart. hetnessed adj. Describing a drinker who has made a settled matter of the barmaid's presumed love life. Meddie got hetnessed and spent ten minutes pairing the barmaid with every unattached man present. hetolled adj. A drinker who has acquired the sharp, faintly medicinal air of a chemistry cupboard and is still ordering halves. Veda went hetolled after several ciders, carrying a faintly chemical tang towards the smoking area. hetroed (/ˈhɛtɹəʊd/) adj. A drinker so far gone that every passing acquaintance is treated as a potential sweetheart. Tira got hetroed and complimented the doorman, the kebab seller and a poster for a local band.