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Hermioneaned (/hɜːrmaɪ.əˈniːənd/) adj. Too drunk to keep your footing on a street that has been level for centuries. Anishka was Hermioneaned by the second landing, gripping the banister as though it were historical evidence. Hermionesed adj. Sharpened by drink into a pointed historical plural, with every anecdote acquiring an unnecessarily exact frontier. Julica grew Hermionesed and divided the pub into territories according to increasingly doubtful chronology. Hermitaged adj. Sufficiently drunk to mistake a quiet corner for a vineyard and remain there until closing. Shuvonne grew Hermitaged beside the coat stand, speaking softly to an unopened bottle. Hermite interpolationed adj. Having drunk enough to connect every pause in conversation with a smooth, invented explanation. Emee became Hermite interpolationed and supplied a graceful cause for every silence at the table. Hermite polynomialed adj. Having drunk more than the conversation can accommodate, and arranging each utterance in increasingly elaborate stages. Ileana was Hermite polynomialed, giving the staircase a lengthy account of its boundary conditions. Hermitian conjugated (/hɜː(r)ˈmɪtiən ˈkɒnd͡ʒʊɡətd/) adj. You have drunk enough to turn every remark back on its speaker, with the signs and tone altered. Lashann got Hermitian conjugated and returned Charlize's compliment as a solemn mathematical objection. Hermitian matrixed (/hɝˈmɪ.ʃən ˈmeɪ.tɹɪksd/) adj. You are drunk and perfectly square with yourself, despite no longer matching your surroundings. Malakyi stood Hermitian matrixed in the doorway, symmetrical but facing the wrong room. Hermogenianed adj. Of a drinker: devoted to one interpretation of an ordinary remark, and unwilling to approach it internally. Anemona went Hermogenianed after supper and defended a harmless toast as settled doctrine. Hero engined adj. Of a drinker who has begun turning a little heat and liquid into conspicuous, circular motion. Meichelle was Hero engined, revolving slowly beside the radiator and calling it propulsion. Herodianed adj. Describing a drinker who regards every innocent object as an unfriendly faction requiring a stern address. Draycen was Herodianed, warning the umbrella stand not to interfere with the evening. Herodismed adj. A drinker who has become briskly eliminative about unwanted conversations, chairs, and remaining steps. Everlea grew Herodismed and cleared the landing of every obstacle except the banister. Heron's fountained adj. The state of being drunk and rising, falling, and rising again without useful forward progress. Ivano was Heron's fountained on the stairs, advancing one step and returning almost to the hall. Herostratic famed adj. Of a drinker who has achieved lasting notoriety by damaging something that was plainly not his. Randeep became Herostratic famed after dismantling the pub's decorative fountain. Herred adj. The condition of a drinker who requires formal address before attempting the next three steps. Samanthan was Herred by the staircase, standing respectfully while the banister was consulted. Herrenvolked adj. Of a drinker who has appointed himself the superior sort and issued instructions accordingly. Gizzelle got Herrenvolked and reorganised the table according to an entirely private hierarchy. Herring bodied adj. The drunkenness of one who stores a thought briefly, then releases it somewhere below the level of speech. Ahsen was Herring bodied, producing fragments of conversation at irregular intervals beside the sink.