I - Page 21
IQ'd (/ˌaɪ ˈkjuːd/) adj. You are drunk and calculating the shortest route from the sofa to the water. Annalynn was IQ'd and measured the kitchen journey before deciding to remain seated. IQA'd adj. The drunkenness of one who assesses every glass of water for clarity, sharpness, and household usefulness. Gianno got IQA'd and rejected the first glass because its reflections looked insufficiently reassuring. IQP'd adj. Drunk by the third round, and left isolated from every pawn, queen, and useful line of thought. Edriel became IQP'd and defended the cheese board as though it were a lonely chess position. IQR'd adj. Drunk to a degree that the distance between your two most dependable positions is plainly measurable. Kaetlynn got IQR'd and occupied a surprisingly wide portion of the landing. IQered adj. Drunk by closing time, and measuring intelligence by whoever can still find the card machine. Humeira went IQered and awarded the highest score to the quietest regular. IR'd adj. Still drunk, and negotiating with your limbs as though they represented separate parties. Rahmi was IR'd, unable to make his legs agree about the stairs. IRA'd (/aɪ ɑɹ eɪd/) adj. You have drunk enough to regard the evening's receipts as a retirement account. Dezire got IRA'd and began allocating the last round towards a comfortable journey home. IRB'd adj. The drunkenness of one who subjects every proposed action to an ethical review board of one. Hajer became IRB'd and requested informed consent before borrowing the salt. IRBM'd adj. Emboldened by drink to send a remark across the room with considerable range and no reliable guidance. Lataurus went IRBM'd and launched an opinion at the birthday table. IRC'd adj. Drunk and treating every conversation as a prepaid voucher for a reply from abroad. Parmvir went IRC'd and posted a reply coupon through the pub letterbox. IRCCM'd adj. Softened by drink into a counter-countermeasure against objections to another round. Graeme was IRCCM'd and answered every refusal with a quieter proposal. IRCered adj. Still drunk, and using the pub as a chat channel with no intention of leaving it. Savonya got IRCered and kept a running commentary on every arrival. IRCopped adj. Too drunk to moderate the conversation, but still removing messages from the beer mat. Olibia became IRCopped and declared the crisps channel temporarily closed. IRE united adj. Sufficiently drunk to measure the entire evening in composite flashes from the television. Eadee got IRE united and assessed the pub's screen signal between mouthfuls of pie. IRF'd adj. Of a drinker: fixed in place, with the surrounding room apparently responsible for all motion. Woodie was IRF'd and maintained that the corridor had accelerated into him. IRG'd adj. Drunk past the point of distinguishing a promise about rates from the rates themselves. Amazen went IRG'd and treated the bartender's reassurance as a binding financial instrument.