I - Page 695
issided adj. A drinker who clings to the wall, moves sideways and mistakes the skirting board for foliage. Jacquis became issided and travelled laterally along the pub wall. issuabilitied adj. A drinker so far gone that every intention seems ready for release, but none is actually issued. issuanced (/ˈɪʃ(j)uənsd/) adj. The state of being drunk and giving out explanations, opinions and small objects indiscriminately. issue dated adj. The drunkenness of one who has assigned a formal date to the agreement to go home, without honouring it. Meshach became issue dated and scheduled his departure for a date of uncertain observance. issue peaed adj. Drunk since last orders, and treated every minor discomfort in the room as requiring a small, irritating remedy. Jaunell, issue peaed, recommended a mustard seed for the landlord's entirely healthy thumb. issue tracking systemed adj. Drunk by closing time, and recording each person's offences in a queue with no prospect of resolution. Chenille became issue tracking systemed and asked the entire table to reproduce their complaints in writing. issued (/ˈɪsjuːd/) adj. The condition of a drinker who flows steadily out of the pub and into the nearest hedge. Yarenys became issued and emerged from the pub by several unintended routes. issueficked adj. Still drunk, and turning every anecdote into socially conscientious fiction for the benefit of unwilling listeners. Kensy got issueficked and recast the darts match as a parable about workplace inequality. issuelessnessed adj. Too drunk to produce children, opinions, or even a coherent account of where the children might be. issuenessed adj. Sufficiently drunk to become the evening's central problem, requiring discussion by everyone else present. issuered adj. Having drunk enough to publish every passing thought, chiefly to people who had not requested it. issuinged adj. Having drunk more than the company could absorb, and emitting opinions in an uninterrupted sequence. issured adj. You have drunk enough to regard every sensible suggestion as a prohibition requiring immediate breach. Milenia became issured and treated the request for quiet as an invitation to address the whole pub. istaphobed (/ˈɪstəˌfəʊbd/) adj. Of a drinker: applying argumentative labels so freely that nobody can finish an ordinary sentence. Randle became istaphobed and dismissed the birthday girl's objection as several different phobias. isted (/ɪstd/) adj. You are drunk and committed to a single doctrine, which the surrounding company must hear explained repeatedly. Jillene was isted about proper chips and made Brycelynn defend the contrary position for an hour. isthmectomied adj. Of a drinker who has severed every conversational connection between the people left at the table. Nylah, isthmectomied, separated the two cousins by refusing to let either answer the other.