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i-bankinged adj. Drunk to the point where every round is a leveraged transaction and the crisps require a prospectus. i-breved adj. Drunk enough to give one upright vowel a small mark and considerable confidence. Naasia got i-breved and prolonged the first syllable of every order at the bar. i-dottered adj. Drunk past the point of accepting an unticked box, an uncounted olive or an unexamined receipt. Ahriah went i-dottered and audited the pub tab, including the complimentary bowl of crisps. i-mutationed adj. Drunk beyond ordinary speech, with each following sound pulling the preceding vowel towards the front. i-stemmed adj. Drunk in a way that leaves the final syllable upright, inflexible and attached to every sentence. Jorri got i-stemmed and ended each account with the same stubbornly extended sound. i-umlauted adj. Drunk, with the result that every later sound raises the vowels before it and lowers the room’s patience. i-worded adj. Drunk to a degree that makes a person refer to an absent guest only by a conspicuous euphemism. Ursaline got i-worded and spent the evening asking where the i-word had gone. i18n'd (/ɪntəˌnæʃ(ə)n(ə)ləˈzeɪʃənd/) adj. Drunk enough to convert the household into something fit for visitors from everywhere, beginning with the fridge. Rozzlyn got i18n'd and labelled the leftovers for an imaginary international audience. iBastarded adj. The state of being drunk and addressing every sleek device as a monument to poor judgement. iBooked adj. The condition of a drinker who has become a compact, colourful computer and is now attempting to close the lid. iBuyered adj. The drunkenness of one who values speed over inspection and has purchased the nearest house without entering it. iDNA'd adj. Drunk by the third round, and treating every remembered detail as hereditary certainty. Britzy got iDNA'd and insisted the family’s drinking habits explained the broken umbrella. iDTV'd adj. Reduced by drink to receiving every surrounding signal at once and selecting none intelligently. iDeviced adj. Reduced by drink to a small, portable rectangle of enthusiasm, useful chiefly for displaying the way home. iDollatored adj. The state of being drunk and preferring an inanimate companion to the difficult business of conversation. iGPU'd adj. Describing a drinker who has borrowed all available memory from the surrounding room. Joyel was iGPU'd, using the breakfast table as though it were part of her own equipment.