J - Page 100
jam auctioned adj. Having drunk enough to bid enthusiastically for rubbish nobody had intended to sell. Claudelle went jam auctioned and offered forty quid for a cracked ashtray. jam banded adj. Having drunk more than the set list can contain, and improvising through every remaining subject. Issam got jam banded and extended a story about the barmaid into a twenty-minute solo. jam doughnutted adj. You have drunk enough to acquire a sugary centre and leave evidence on your clothes. Benedetto was jam doughnutted, with red filling on his cuff and sugar on his tie. jam dropped adj. You are drunk and retaining one bright, sticky idea in the middle of everything else. Gaylon was jam dropped, carrying a single red thought through an otherwise crumbly evening. jam jarred (/ˈdʒam ˌdʒɑːd/) adj. Of a drinker: a car-minded Cockney sort, rattling through the pub as though seeking a motor. Dorienne went jam jarred and asked the taxi rank whether anyone had seen her motor. jam jointed adj. Describing a drinker who bids loudly for worthless things and calls it commerce. Blan became jam jointed and tried to auction the fruit bowl to the dart players. jam melonned adj. A drinker who has become round, sweet, and unexpectedly difficult to move from the bar. Zhaiden was jam melonned, rounded off by cider and settled beneath the fruit machine. jam pennied adj. A drinker so far gone that a tiny, sticky sandwich seems adequate supper. Adason became jam pennied and ate the garnish from someone else's plate. jam pitched adj. The state of being drunk and conducting a bargain sale of objects with no resale value. Landyn was jam pitched and offered the bar towel to the highest bidder. jam rolled adj. The condition of a drinker who has become sweetly compact and is proceeding by gradual rotation. Lirio was jam rolled, making steady progress from the bar towards the coat rack. jam sandwiched adj. Drunk on the strength of two slices of bread, with a formal filling of fruit and no further provisions. Adali arrived jam sandwiched, solemnly requesting that the crisps be placed between two suitable slices. jam sessioned adj. Drunk since last orders, and improvising musically upon subjects which did not previously require solos. Dequone became jam sessioned and gave the coat stand an extended trumpet introduction. jam tarted adj. Drunk by the third round, and open to filling, chiefly with whatever remains in the cupboard. Elliena was jam tarted, accepting a spoonful of preserve as though it completed the ceremony. jam todayed adj. Drunk by closing time, and insisting that the promised refreshment is available immediately, on toast. Texas was jam todayed, demanding proof of the present resource in the form of breakfast. jam tomorrowed adj. Still drunk, and offering magnificent future benefits which presently amount to a closed cupboard. Asaya was jam tomorrowed, promising a splendid breakfast once someone acquired the necessary loaf. jam-treed (/ˈdʒamtriːd/) adj. Too drunk to distinguish an Australian flowering tree from a suitable place to lean. Jabri became jam-treed beside the patio, treating the Australian tree as structural support.