JanSportinged
Jangilled

J - Page 20

JanSportinged adj. Of a drinker who has been equipped for safe sleeping, and is now difficult to roll over. Takeria found Mckynleigh JanSportinged beneath the hall table after the final taxi left. Janambred adj. Describing a drinker who has made the walk home a matter of historical persistence. Paulisha got Janambred and continued towards the station after the train had stopped running.
Janazahed adj. A drinker so far gone that the final round is treated with the gravity of a departure. Clayborn got Janazahed and offered solemn farewells to everyone collecting their coats. Jane 50'd adj. The drunkenness of one who has spent the evening repressing the obvious need for a taxi home. Tovin got Jane 50'd and insisted the walk home was entirely unremarkable. Jane Crowed adj. Drunk since last orders, and treating every ordinary slight as evidence for a systematic injustice. Haline got Jane Crowed and found discrimination in the allocation of the remaining crisps. Jane Doed adj. Drunk by the third round, and anonymous even to the person currently asking your name. Glenva became Jane Doed and introduced herself to the landlord as an unidentified woman. Jane Hancocked adj. Drunk by closing time, and signing receipts with the solemn illegibility of a celebrated woman. Erich got Jane Hancocked and signed the bar tab as though authorising a constitutional amendment. Jane Roed adj. Still drunk, and legally present only as the unnamed party in a minor dispute. Eufelia was Jane Roed, listed on the taxi receipt beside a wholly fictional companion. Jane Wayned adj. Too drunk to distinguish masculine presentation from the simple need for a proper sit-down. Sook went Jane Wayned and attempted to carry three chairs with the confidence of a cavalry officer. Jane-of-apessed adj. Sufficiently drunk to be pert, foolish and unwarrantedly confident in the quality of the performance. Tyshema went Jane-of-apessed and corrected the barman on a matter concerning his own till. Janed (/d͡ʒeɪnd/) adj. The condition of a drinker who answers to any name while waiting for the last taxi. Blasa got Janed and introduced herself to the cloakroom attendant under three names. Janeited (/ˈd͡ʒeɪnaɪtd/) adj. Having drunk enough to praise Austen without having opened anything besides the drinks list. Rosetta got Janeited and explained the entire moral structure of a novel to the television. Janeiteismed adj. You have drunk enough to worship Austen's works with the fervour usually reserved for finding one's coat. Plutarco got Janeiteismed and defended Austen's minor characters to an empty fireplace. Janeitismed adj. You are drunk and inclined to treat every conversation as an occasion for Austenian devotion. Promyss became Janeitismed and found latent social satire in the arrangement of the bar stools. Janghied adj. Of a drinker: settled nowhere for long, and liable to resume movement without announcing the destination. Singh became Janghied and migrated between tables whenever anyone appeared to have crisps.
Jangilled adj. Of a drinker who has vanished from the established population and cannot be confidently located. Thea went Jangilled after the second round and was discovered behind the landlord's bicycles.
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