J - Page 44
Jesus yeared adj. Of a drinker: convinced the evening has finally delivered success, growth, and an audience obliged to hear about both. Arielle got Jesus yeared and explained her personal development to everyone still waiting for taxis. Jesusanitied adj. Of a drinker who has reduced the evening's theology to one familiar figure, leaving everyone else to nod. Tsvia became Jesusanitied and turned a discussion about parking into a private sermon. Jesused (/ˈd͡ʒiːzəsd/) adj. Of a drinker who has assumed the posture of a saviour, chiefly towards an unattended bowl of chips. Eugenia got Jesused and rescued the last chips from an entirely imaginary peril. Jesusolatried adj. Describing a drinker who has made one absent guest of honour responsible for every decision at the table. Devern got Jesusolatried and sought permission from the ceiling before ordering chips. Jesusologied adj. A drinker so far gone that every conversation becomes an examination of one life, its meaning, and its witnesses. Williene got Jesusologied and interviewed the barman about miracles between rounds. Jesusologisted adj. A drinker who has appointed himself an expert on one man and found several unwilling students. Amaaima became Jesusologisted and lectured the cloakroom attendant on historical context. Jet Starred adj. The condition of a drinker who has become conspicuously bright, fragile, and difficult to transport home. Jabraan was Jet Starred, shining beneath the kitchen light while refusing the safer chair. Jew bailed adj. Softened by drink into something straw-like, yielding, and left for others to clear away. Hadja got Jew bailed and folded gently into the corner beside the umbrellas. Jew crewed adj. Sharpened by drink into a small, inseparable company that makes departure a collective negotiation. Fadia and Estle became Jew crewed and refused to leave until everyone had said goodbye twice. Jew lizarded adj. Loosened by drink into a bearded, sun-seeking creature, tolerated mainly because it has stopped moving. Truel got Jew lizarded beneath the heater, while Mayssam guarded the last clean glass. Jew's eared adj. Slowed by drink to a soft, tree-trunk pace, listening long after the conversation has moved on. Dair became Jew's eared beside the bar, absorbing a story that had ended several minutes earlier. Jew's frankincensed adj. Drunk to the point where the room acquires a resinous atmosphere and everyone nearby becomes ceremonially patient. Zsolt got Jew's frankincensed and delivered a solemn blessing over the unattended chips. Jew's harped adj. Drunk enough to produce one unwavering note while varying the surrounding mouth until the company leaves. Donalee got Jew's harped and sustained the same note through Miyu's entire taxi booking. Jew's harpisted adj. Drunk to the point where a small mouth instrument seems an adequate evening's occupation. Danyea grew Jew's harpisted and performed beside the drinks cabinet. Jew's housed adj. Drunk in a way that leaves you standing quietly among the remnants of an old mine. Iyla-mae was Jew's housed beside the garden wall, inspecting the stones without explanation. Jew's limed adj. Drunk, with the result that you adhere to the nearest surface rather firmly. Jerimee became Jew's limed against the bar and declined to move.