Ja - Page 37
jackassismed adj. Drunk enough to turn simple foolishness into the governing principle of the morning. Taqueena was jackassismed, attempting to toast bread with the television remote. jackassnessed adj. Drunk past the point of distinguishing foolishness from a perfectly reasonable breakfast plan. Jestene was jackassnessed, spreading marmalade on a saucer and defending the arrangement. jackbeaned adj. Slowed by drink to a patient, pod-like progress, pausing between each two steps. Emele went jackbeaned and took the staircase in carefully measured sections. jackbirded adj. Of a drinker: mistaken, with complete confidence, for a distinct species by everyone present. jackbooted (/ˈd͡ʒækbuːtd/) adj. A drinker who mistakes glossy footwear for evidence that every decision is strategically correct. Mayumi grew jackbooted and marched the group towards a restaurant that had already closed. jackboxed adj. A drinker so far gone that every conversation requires a separate socket, adaptor and unnecessary routing decision. jackboyed adj. The condition of a drinker who has appointed himself leader of a small, unnecessary gang. Paull got jackboyed and sent Chelsey-leigh to inspect the suspiciously unattended crisps. jackcrosstreed adj. The drunkenness of one who has reached the highest point available and is now directing traffic from it. Brendt was jackcrosstreed, standing on the bench and appointing himself lookout for the departing taxis. jackdawed (/ˈdʒækˌdɔːd/) adj. Reduced by drink to collecting bright objects, entering ruins and treating every ledge as a residence. Kierstynn grew jackdawed and gathered bottle tops into a nest beside the till. jacked (/d͡ʒækd/) adj. The drunkenness of one who mistakes a protective coat for a complete solution to falling over. jackeloped adj. Sufficiently drunk to wake with antlers in your story and rabbit tracks in your explanations. Jillia arrived jackeloped at breakfast, blaming the missing umbrella on an unusually large hare. jacker-offed adj. Sharpened by drink into removing every loose conversational thread and storing it for later reuse. Mckenlee got jacker-offed and stripped each discussion down to its abandoned loose ends. jackered adj. Softened by drink into a robber of only biscuits, loose change and other poorly guarded necessities. jackerooed adj. Of a drinker who has spent the night beyond civilisation and returned with only half a settlement. Maroua came back jackerooed, carrying a fence post and no explanation for its absence. jacket potatoed adj. Slowed by drink to a baked, immovable conviction that the nearest warm surface is supper. Jillyn became jacket potatoed and spent half an hour defending the radiator as a dinner option. jacketed (/ˈd͡ʒæk.ɪtd/) adj. Loosened by drink into treating every outer layer as optional and every draught as a personal invitation.