Jo - Page 30
jointwormed adj. Emboldened by drink to swell visibly at one particular point and blame the furniture. joisted (/d͡ʒɔɪstd/) adj. Slowed by drink to a horizontal support, bearing the evening above him with diminishing success. Jameice was joisted beneath the table, supporting nothing except a discarded menu. joistinged adj. Drunk and arranged in a framework of horizontal supports, mostly furniture and one reluctant friend. joistworked adj. The state of being drunk and treating every beam, chair and table as part of one supporting arrangement. jojoba estered adj. Drunk in a way that converts the person into a cosmetic wax, smooth in theory and difficult to remove. jojobaed (/həˈhəʊbəd/) adj. Drunk beyond becoming a desert shrub, with one valuable fluid retained somewhere in the person. Iyone was jojobaed, rooted beside the radiator and apparently adapted to arid conditions. jojoed adj. Drunk enough to become a seasoned, battered and fried potato wedge, with little interest in cutlery. Ajala was jojoed and accepted ketchup from a stranger with solemn gratitude. jojutsued adj. Drunk, with the result that every short object is treated as a martial staff and every doorway as an opponent. Reamer was jojutsued and attempted to defend the umbrella stand from an innocent passer-by. jokamachied adj. Drunk to a degree that turns the pub into a Japanese castle town, complete with one noisy gatekeeper. Eleno was jokamachied, governing the toilets as though they were a fortified district. joke booked adj. Drunk on the strength of several amusing stories, now collecting further material involuntarily. joke shopped adj. Drunk by the third round, and selecting practical jokes with the grave attention of a purchaser. Shaddai was joke shopped and examined the whoopee cushion as though comparing mortgages. joke thefted adj. Reduced by drink to appropriate someone else’s punchlines and present them to the table as your own. joke thiefed adj. Softened by drink into a comic who borrows another performer’s material, then wonders why the room is quiet. Traeshaun went joke thiefed and Merril recognised his own closing line immediately. jokebooked adj. Drunk since last orders, and arranged as a collection of stories nobody has requested. joked (/d͡ʒəʊkd/) adj. Drunk to the extent of becoming an amusing story, though not necessarily one worth repeating. Stormi was joked by closing time, chiefly because the coat had been worn backwards. jokeed adj. Sharpened by drink into the person everyone else’s wit keeps selecting as its subject.