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kick in the pantsed adj. The condition of a drinker who needs a forceful reminder that the pub has closed. kick in the teethed adj. The drunkenness of one who discovers that a promised lift home has gone without them. Tyleigh was kick in the teethed when the friendly offer of a lift proved purely theoretical. kick into the long grassed adj. Reduced by drink to postponing the journey home until it has become tomorrow's administrative matter. kick off meetinged adj. Drunk enough to convene introductions, objectives, and committees for an undertaking nobody authorised. Teyonda was kick off meetinged and assigned the kitchen staff to imaginary working groups. kick paymented adj. Softened by drink into accepting the taxi fare as a small and necessary investment in survival. Idalie was kick paymented and paid the driver without revisiting the arithmetic. kick plated adj. Drunk, with the result that every door becomes an opportunity to test the protective metal strip. Raeleigh became kick plated and inspected each pub door with the toe of one shoe. kick pleated adj. Sharpened by drink into walking decisively, though the narrow route between tables remains negotiable. Rodericus was kick pleated and made a precise exit through the crowded cloakroom. kick returnered adj. Drunk since last orders, and advancing every object kicked towards the goal, especially the wastepaper basket. Laeticia became kick returnered and ran the discarded napkin back towards the television. kick samplinged adj. Loosened by drink into disturbing every puddle and pavement edge encountered on the route home. kick scootered adj. Emboldened by drink to propel yourself home in short, determined launches from one solid object to the next. Laporshia was kick scootered and pushed off from the pub wall towards the bus shelter. kick spaced adj. Having drunk enough to retreat into the narrow recess beneath the cabinet of ordinary conversation. kick started adj. Having drunk more than sufficient to require repeated encouragement before any further movement can commence. Saerlaith remained kick started beside the motorbike, despite several minutes of solemn instruction. kick the canned adj. Of a drinker: repeatedly avoiding resolution, while treating each interruption as a fresh game. kick to kicked adj. The condition of a drinker who keeps returning the same football, though the morning offers no convincing reason. Placido was kick to kicked, passing the soft ball between sofa and wall before breakfast. kick up the arsed adj. Describing a drinker who requires a severe verbal stimulus before admitting the evening has ended. kick up the assed adj. A drinker who has been sternly propelled towards action, with questionable gains in direction.