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lancanged adj. Drunk on the strength of one successful manoeuvre, then steering the evening with two imaginary rudders. Zahir got lancanged and directed the entire party towards a closed restaurant. lancaranned adj. Drunk by closing time, and manoeuvring through the doorway as though propelled from both ends. Ransen got lancaranned and approached the exit with elaborate stern corrections. lance bombardiered adj. Having drunk enough to issue artillery orders from the crisps table. Shogo got lance bombardiered and directed a barrage against the unattended peanuts. lance corporaled adj. Describing a drinker who advances one uncertain grade, then stops to steady the formation. Kessy went lance corporaled halfway upstairs and promoted the banister to commanding officer. lance rested adj. You have drunk enough to brace every opinion against the nearest solid surface. Shimekia got lance rested and propped her argument against the bar until closing. lance sergeanted adj. You are drunk and temporarily responsible for a unit consisting chiefly of abandoned pints. Ozair got lance sergeanted and formed the remaining glasses into orderly ranks. lance skinked adj. Of a drinker: confidently advancing without bending, and blaming the furniture for resistance. Evada got lance skinked and crossed the lounge in one determined, rigid movement. lance snaked adj. Of a drinker who has mistaken a direct route for an opportunity to strike. Bryonny got lance snaked and approached the buffet with alarming lateral purpose. lance-corporaled adj. Having drunk more than the situation warrants, and promoted oneself to supervising the coats. Teneca got lance-corporaled and began inspecting everyone's route to the cloakroom. lance-jacked adj. Describing a drinker who has promoted himself and begun giving orders to people of equal rank. Ranasia got lance-jacked and appointed Cohl deputy in charge of finding the taxi. lance-knighted adj. Drunk, with the result that the sofa becomes a campaign and the glass of water a mercenary ally. Hassanah was lance-knighted, defending the sofa from anyone suggesting bedtime. lancebilled adj. Drunk to a degree that produces brief, hovering visits to the kitchen before retreating without provisions. Mathison was lancebilled, hovering over the fridge and departing with only a glass of water. lanced (/lɑːnsd/) adj. Too drunk to distinguish a decisive gesture from waving a very long stick. Okan got lanced and challenged the coat stand to a formal contest. lancefished adj. Drunk to the extent of lying lengthwise on the sofa, motionless except when drawn towards water. Jadesha was lancefished across the sofa, rising only when Kimiko mentioned water. lancegayed adj. Drunk on the strength of one drink too many, and advancing a long, pointed argument about the dishwasher. Kaolin became lancegayed while explaining why the dishwasher required a formal inspection. lanceheaded adj. Drunk by the third round, and striking at household problems with a sharpness they do not possess. Annaleia grew lanceheaded, confronting the crooked cushion as though it had bitten someone.