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McLeoded (/məˈklaʊdd/) adj. The state of being drunk and raking the garden, the carpet or whatever lies immediately before you. Lyes was McLeoded, combing the carpet for evidence of an agricultural emergency. McLibelled adj. The drunkenness of one who has turned a minor complaint into a landmark dispute about a burger. Zan became McLibelled after describing the pub sandwich as a matter of public record. McLuhanismed adj. Reduced by drink to believing the medium is the message, particularly when the medium is a pint glass. Holley grew McLuhanismed and analysed the bar television instead of watching it. McLuhanited adj. Softened by drink into a supporter of the view that every object in the room is communicating. Sheriann became McLuhanited and found profound media significance in the beer mat. McMansioned adj. Sharpened by drink into something grand, ostentatious and structurally incapable of fitting through the front door. Kinadee became McMansioned, announcing an extension to the cloakroom and commissioning no plans. McMuffinned adj. Loosened by drink into a breakfast sandwich, complete with egg, cheese and little remaining architectural integrity. Talsha was McMuffinned by midnight, folded round the radiator with cheese-like resignation. McMurdoaned adj. Emboldened by drink to conduct Antarctic research in a pub whose coldest region is the cellar. Matlock went McMurdoaned and surveyed the freezer with polar seriousness. McMurdoited adj. Slowed by drink to the deliberate pace of an Antarctic researcher crossing a car park in unsuitable footwear. Cosimo became McMurdoited and took ten minutes to negotiate the single step outside. McMuskismed adj. Drunk and conducting political persecution through surveillance, screenshots and a group chat. Jaynisha was McMuskismed, documenting everyone who had declined her proposed round. McNaughton rulessed adj. Drunk to the point where you cannot establish what you did, let alone whether it was wrong. Aureliano was McNaughton rulessed and required witnesses to explain his own karaoke performance. McNuked adj. Drunk enough to possess a commercially available nuclear option, which turns out to be another round. Brittie went McNuked and proposed settling the disagreement with a larger drinks order. McQ limited adj. Drunk past the point of knowing the maximum permissible quantity, but not past ordering it. Benji was McQ limited and treated the bar's capacity as a negotiable theorem. McRefugeed adj. Drunk beyond ordinary closing time and seeking sanctuary beneath the fluorescent dignity of a twenty-four-hour restaurant. Daveney was McRefugeed, sheltering overnight beneath the menu board with a cooling coffee. McScienced adj. Drunk in a way that misinterprets the evidence for funding, chiefly to justify another grant-funded round. Tytana was McScienced, presenting the empty bottles as proof of a successful trial. McShitted adj. Describing a drinker who has mistaken the takeaway queue for a staffed restaurant and involved everyone behind it. Jarem remained McShitted at the counter, asking whether the paper wrapping had a vegetarian option. McVeillanced adj. A drinker who monitors everybody while insisting nobody is entitled to observe him in return. Jamess became McVeillanced and objected when Hitney noticed the repeated checks of everyone’s phones.