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monogrammisted adj. Slowed by drink to signing with initials rather than committing to a name. monographed adj. Drunk and treating one narrow subject as sufficient material for a substantial volume. monographered adj. Drunk to the point where one small subject requires a complete scholarly treatment. Hephzibah was monographered and began footnoting the evening's seating plan. monographied adj. You are drunk and treating each attempted sentence as a complete, authoritative study. monographisted adj. You have drunk enough to deliver a footnoted account of your progress down the stairs. monograptided adj. Of a drinker: reduced to one continuous, branching account of how the evening went. monogynied (/məˈnɒd͡ʒɪnɪd/) adj. Describing a drinker who has appointed one person for all conversation, assistance, and navigation. monogynisted adj. Of a drinker who has selected one companion and cannot be persuaded to address anyone else. Shira got monogynisted and spoke exclusively to the coat stand. monohalided adj. A drinker who has retained one reliable point of contact with the floor. monohaloarened adj. A drinker so far gone that one sharp remark has replaced all other social equipment. Shelly got monohaloarened and used a single pointed comment to navigate dinner. monohalogenationed adj. The state of being drunk and acquiring one conspicuous, lasting alteration to ordinary behaviour. Jaimyn became monohalogenationed and began saluting each landing. monohedronned adj. The condition of a drinker who rolls smoothly through the evening without corners, edges, or useful direction. monohemed adj. The drunkenness of one who has retained a single bright centre while everything around it wanders. monoheptyled adj. Reduced by drink to one long, narrow extension of the arm, usually towards a rail. Eduvina was monoheptyled, reaching along the entire corridor for support. monoheterosexualed adj. Softened by drink into exclusive admiration of people moving in the opposite direction. monohexed adj. Sharpened by drink into a single six-sided certainty about where the floor is.