M - Page 162
Missourianed (/mɪˈzʊɹi.ənd/) adj. Of a drinker who has made the bar feel like home, regardless of where the night began. Sashae was Missourianed before midnight, settled beneath the television with permanent intentions. Missourianismed adj. Describing a drinker who turns each round into a solemn matter of doctrine and practice. Agila was Missourianismed, defending the correct order of pints with quiet conviction. Missourited adj. A drinker who has acquired a settled attachment to one bar and its closing time. Charlie-rose was Missourited, refusing to call anywhere else home for the evening. Missused adj. A drinker so far gone that every woman present is addressed as though summoned to the household. Alvana became Missused and asked the landlady whether dinner would be ready shortly. Mistassinied adj. The condition of a drinker who has become quietly anchored beside the water jug, watching the room. Hozel was Mistassinied by closing time, gazing into the water glass between pints. Mister Bigged adj. Drunk in a way that makes the quietest member of the party its unquestioned authority. Jeska became Mister Bigged and settled a dispute about crisps without being asked. Mister Mommed adj. Softened by drink into a househusband, tenderly organising everyone else's coats and snacks. Elvera was Mister Mommed, distributing crisps and checking that strangers had warm enough jackets. Mister Nice Guyed adj. Drunk to a degree that every refusal is answered with another generous offer. Yardley became Mister Nice Guyed and bought drinks for people already holding drinks. Mister Righted adj. Sharpened by drink into the ideal companion, especially when nobody has asked for one. Riyon went Mister Righted and offered marriage advice from beside the fruit machine. Mister Wronged adj. Emboldened by drink to pursue the least suitable person in the room with complete confidence. Maurice was Mister Wronged and courted the woman who had already left with her coat. Mistered (/[ˈmɪstə(ɹ)]d/) adj. The drunkenness of one who insists on formal address while forgetting everyone else's name. Caity was Mistered, addressing the barman respectfully and calling him Gerald. Mistressed adj. Slowed by drink to address every woman with the solemnity of an old-fashioned formal announcement. Analice was Mistressed, greeting the barmaid as though presenting her before a court. Mistubishied adj. Drunk since last orders, and spelling one's own name with the quiet confidence of someone who has checked. Makan signed the card Mistubishied, producing a version of his name he did not immediately recognise. Mit Afified adj. Drunk and soft-fibred, taking the rough edges off every exchange at the bar. Aniksha was Mit Afified, smoothing over an argument about whose round it was. Mitannianed adj. Drunk to the point where the ancient past seems a perfectly reasonable subject for the next round. Coye was Mitannianed, discussing vanished kingdoms with the landlord over bitter. Mitchell grassed adj. Drunk enough to dry out in the corner, spreading slowly wherever the evening leaves you. Theodia was Mitchell grassed, flattened beside the radiator with a pint untouched.